The Patronus
by La Mariannette
Summary: ON HIATUS. Lily Evans never HATED the Marauders, she merely didn't like them. But when Voldemort takes an interest in the muggleborn Head Girl, James is the first to help her. When circumstances change, how will Lily adjust to this side of James Potter?
1. Default Chapter

**DISCLAIMER - I do _not_ own _any_ Harry Potter things, except the stuff I make up! If I did, I promise you it wouldn't be posted _here_!**

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She could hear her father playingan olderBeatles album downstairs on the record player, and she smiled as she bit the end of her quill, a habit she had been trying to break ceaselessly for nearly two years. She had to admit she was getting better about it, and she began to dream off when she heard the tapping on her window. After nearly seven years of mail coming and going in this fashion, she still found herself squeaking and falling off of her bed. Sighing, she went to open the window. Rolling her eyes, she identified the owl as _his_ owl instantly. Taking the letter, she smiled at the owl as it flew off. Turning to the letter, she frowned immediately.

His normal meticulous handwriting was hasty and scribbled, more like that Sirius Black friend of his than she had ever seen. Opening it to see what was the cause of the rush, she felt the blood drain from her face as she read it.

_ Whatever you do, _do not_ go outside. They found out that you're going to be  
Head Girl, and they don't like it. They're going to be watching your house,  
with dementors too, most likely. _Do not_ go out, and don't let anyone leave your  
house either. I swear, this is _not_ a joke. Sirius, Remus, and I are on our way  
__over to your house right now to explain it better. Please, _don't go outside_.  
__See you soon.  
__ James_

On any other situation, she would have rolled her eyes and laughed it off. But not when it was so uncharacteristic of him, and not after all that had happened. After all, hadn't Gideon and Marlene _both_ warned her to be careful this summer? And wasn't there rumor of a rising Dark Lord? Eyes going wide in realization, she ran down the stairs, ignoring her sister's screams of _be quiet!_ as she went. Her mother looked up from the food she was cooking and asked gently, "What ever's the matter darling? You look like you've seen a ghost."

"Don't go outside. We can't go outside mum," she said sharply as her father walked in, smiling.

"Why not? It's a beautiful day outside."

"Dad! No, something's wrong. Just _don't_ go outside, please."

Her tall, thin sister walked down the stairs, asking snappishly, "What's this about not going out? Vernon's coming over to take me out in a quarter of an hour."

Groaning, she looked at her sister, surprising the thin girl with the intense seriousness in her eyes, "Bring him inside. It shouldn't take long. I just need to figure out what's going on."

Running to the door, she looked outside and frowned at the huge black figures at the end of the street. She opened the door slightly and heard the yell as she saw three tall, handsome boys dart towards her, "Don't open that door! Get back inside!"

Hearing the yells, the three remaining members of her family joined her in the sitting room. Before the words could register, they hurtled inside and slammed the door shut, panting as they saw the bewildered looks on the faces of the four whose house had just been invaded. One, with messy black hair and probing hazel eyes, extended his arm to her father and said breathlessly, "James Potter, sir. Sorry about the invasion, but it's necessary."

Frowning, the man motioned to the couches in the sitting room. The tallest of the three, ruggedly handsome with elegantly striking features, sat as James and the other one shook their heads in polite refusal. The girl who had rolled her eyes at James' owl now approached the window. She saw the black figures, wondering why they made her so terribly scared. Idly placing her hand on the window, she jumped back and yelped. Bright green eyes wide, she turned to the three boys, "It's ice! What's going on?"

James swallowed. It had been so much easier in his mind, before he saw her wide, innocent eyes looking at them like that. Clearing his throat, he began awkwardly before breaking off abruptly, "Look, Evans –. Lily, this isn't a joke, I promise. Moony, are they any closer?"

The other boy who had stood beside James, a tall, brown-haired boy with twinkling golden eyes shook his head and smiled at the four very confused members of the Evans family, "Mr. Evans. Mrs. Evans. I wish I could have seen you again under better circumstances."

Standing, the tall, handsome one stood and said roughly, "But you probably want to know what the hell's going on and why your suddenly being treated like you're under house arrest. Sirius Black. Mr. Potter, James' father will be here in a couple of minutes and he can explain it to you."

"Just in case he's late though," Remus said carefully, "Lily, do you know the Patronus charm? Do you think you could use it?"

"The Patronus charm?" Lily stuttered. "But that's past N.E.W.T. level wand work. I don't know."

"For Merlin's sake Evans!" Sirius snapped, glancing out the door anxiously, "Can you do the charm or not?"

Freezing, Lily stared at them. Stepping forward and putting a hand on his daughter's shoulder, Mr. Evans said sternly, "Now, young man, I've said nothing about you appearing in my house without any notice. But I will stop you and ask you to leave if you speak to my daughter like that again."

James' head snapped up and he said softly, eyes hard, "Pardon him sir. He's a bit paranoid right now. But, Evans, didn't you get my owl?"

As the tall girl squealed, Lily turned and snapped, "Petunia! It's not here anymore! I got it about five minutes ago. And I wasn't sure if you were serious or not. I had no idea –"

This time she was interrupted, not by an exasperated young man, but by a large man bursting through the door. Groaning, she sat flat on her butt in the middle of the sitting room. Immediately Mrs. Evans spoke up, taking charge of the situation quickly, "Vernon, these are some of Lily's classmates from school. Yes, _her_ school Petty darling. Harry, dear, why don't you take Vernon into your office for a moment while we resolve this."

The beefy man sputtered for a moment before turning to Petunia Evans, "They're _her_ kind? Did you know?"

Petunia shook her head, eyes wide, and stared at her sister as the man followed her father out of the parlor. She opened her mouth and Lily snapped, eyes flashing, "Not now Petunia! I don't need to hear what you think of my being a witch! And yes, they're wizards! Leave them alone! Not now!"

Mrs. Evans looked reprovingly at Lily as Petunia stalked out. "Lily, dear, she's your sister. I won't say anything, just think on that. I'll go save your father, we know how little he likes Vernon, even if he does love your sister."

Smiling at her mother, Lily stood up and turned to the three, who were watching the exchange with a frown. "Sorry about that. Sister, sister's fiancee. Neither of them are fond of magic. You shouldn't have had to see that."

Remus shook it off and said, "The Patronus. Do you think you can manage it? Any really happy memories?"

Lily paused before sighing, "I think so. I can try. Let me get my wand."

"You don't have your wand with you now?" Sirius asked incredulously.

"No," she said firmly. "I normally don't expect to need it in my own home. I still don't know why I need it now. And James Potter, what on earth are dementors doing here?"

James smiled, "They guard Azkaban, usually. Death Eaters probably made a deal with them and sent them here."

"Azkaban?"

The three smiled, once again reminded of how much muggle-born witches and wizards were at a disadvantage. James reached out and pushed her lightly up the stairs, "The wizarding prison. Now go get your wand."

He watched Lily go up the stairs when he heard the voice of Harry Evans. "You're the James Potter that my daughter writes about. The one who, until the end of last year was incessantly annoying and arrogant. And the one who's had his sights on my baby for three years."

James smiled and said, "I'm sure you can understand why I won't agree with the first one. I was a bit immature, but your daughter's a bit of an exaggerator where people are concerned. Either they're near perfect or they're horrible. But I will agree with the second statement. And I'll correct you on it. I still have my sights on her, but now's not the time or place to try to convince her. But I'll let you know now that I'm hoping to later reintroduce myself to you as your daughter's boyfriend, or fiancee. Just to let you know."

Despite the situation, the man had to smile at the boy's confidence and certainty. "I have to say I admire your gut. Especially considering you're in my house, and the fact my daughter currently has a wand in her hand and is right behind you."

Eyes going wide, James whirled around to see Lily staring at him in shock. There was no anger there, or frustration, merely confusion. Remus and Sirius both saw it and smiled. Suddenly they heard a crash and turned to see the front door slam shut. A tall man, who looked somewhere between mid to late forties, with jet black hair and dark brown eyes, smiled and said apologetically, "Sorry about that. Andrew Potter. You must be Mr. Evans. You probably want some answers."

Mildly amused by the third interruption of the day, Harry nodded and said, "And you're probably the person to give them. Harry Evans. Pleasure to meet you, though it would have been much more enjoyable had my house not been invaded twice before today already."

"Twice?"Andrew Potter asked, eyeing his son quickly.

"My sister's fiancee stopped by," Lily said quickly.

Face molding into understanding, and realization, he smiled at her, "Ah, I see. You must be Miss Evans. We've certainly heard a lot about you, from all of the boys. Congratulations on making Head Girl."

Frowning, Lily asked quickly, "James, you mentioned that. How does everyone know? And who on earth are _they_? You referred to them twice in the letter."

Andrew Potter and Harry Evans both sent James approving looks as James explained quickly, "_They_ are Death Eaters. Followers of Voldemort, the new Dark Lord. He's already more powerful than Grindelwald, and he's gaining more power and more followers right and left. I'm guessing they have a spy that they found out your Head Girl, and since you're muggle-born, it's a big deal to them."

"Stupid gits," Sirius muttered. Then he straightened and said, "Look, Evans, you're a target because you're a muggle-born, and even more now that you're Head Girl. The Death Eaters probably sent the dementors here, and until we can get them back to Azkaban you're in danger here."

"What on earth are demento-things? You've mentioned them already." Harry asked as Lily paled and walked into her kitchen.

Remus explained quickly, "They're dark creatures. They feed on happiness, and if given the opportunity, they _will_ suck the soul out of your mouth. It won't kill you, but you'll be an empty shell of person; nothing left but a body."

Paling, Lily's father asked, his voice strained, "How can we get rid of them?"

Before anyone could speak they heard a shriek from the kitchen. Shaking his head, Harry stopped the four men from running into his kitchen. They listened as Mrs. Evans came out, sighing and shaking her head. Lily's voice came, hard and determined, "Petunia, I'm not going to listen to this. I don't have to listen to this."

"You brought them here, didn't you? You had to bring more of _your kind_ here! Do you have any idea how hard it's going to be to explain this?"

A muffled scream of frustration came from what was obviously Lily, "Don't you get it? Something's wrong! Arg! I'm leaving."

Lily stomped out, tight-lipped as she turned to her parents apologetically, "Sorry."

Taking her arm, Harry led her out of the room as his wife smiled gently, "Petunia, my oldest, isn't too fond of the idea that Lily's a witch. We're proud to death of her, but Petty doesn't see it the same way. My name's Rose Evans."

Bowing and kissing her hand as though it was habit, Andrew smiled and said, "Pleased to meet you missus Evans. I'm afraid, if it's okay with you, that we're going to have to invite you to our house until we can clear up your house. Some of my aurors are on their way to get rid of your little, er, problem."

"Aurors? Oh, I remember Gideon explaining them to me when he came by."

"Gideon Prewett? Smart boy. Is he friends with your daughter?"

"Best," Lily said from the door, "along with Marlene McKinnon. So what are we going to do while the aurors come?"

James avoided eye contact, still flustered by what had happened earlier as his father spoke easily, "You and your family will be coming with me to my house. Yes, your sister and her fiancé as well. For your own safety, it's best nobody is here."

Sighing, Harry muttered in a manner much like Lily, "Good luck with them." With a glance from his wife, he straightened and said with a sigh, "I'll get them Rose dear, and yes, I'll explain the situation as well."

As he walked out he kissed his wife fondly on the cheek and Lily smiled after her father. James marveled at how much the girl apparently adored her father, and shook himself out of his trance-like state to listen to Rose Evans speak. "Oh, well, this is certainly unexpected. Is it okay with your wife Mr. Potter?"

"Andrew, madam, my name's Andrew. And yes, we were planning on taking you elsewhere, but my wife insisted that you come to our house. She's heard many stories about your family, and especially about your daughter, and she's very eager to meet you. We've created a portkey that will take us to Godric's Hollow, our house."

Lily looked at her mother and said, her eyes glittering, "Mum, you know what a portkey is. Remember, Marlene explained it when I took one to her house?"

Nodding with a smile, Mrs. Evans gave her a daughter a look of undisguised affection, "I remember darling. Come help me get some water, or tea, for them. I should have offered earlier."

Straightening, Andrew Potter insisted, "Oh, no. We're quite alright."

Raising an eyebrow, Rose Evans spoke in a firm tone that left no doubt in the minds of the three teenage boys that this woman was most certainly the mother of Lily Evans. "I'll bring you something to drink. I believe you can finish this quickly, but you have not met my oldest daughter. She and Lily are alike in one very important factor; they are both _very_ stubborn."

Lily smiled, taking it as a compliment as she followed her mother into the kitchen, talking to her easily. As the room became empty of the Evans family, Andrew Potter turned to his son and said, "I like her. I like her parents too. Good luck with that one James."

Remus snorted and said, "I told him that in fifth year and he still hasn't had any luck."

Raising an eyebrow, Sirius commented lightly, "But in fifth year Prongs was an arrogant ass-hole."

Glaring at his best friend, James said sarcastically, "Thanks for the support Padfoot."

"Hey," the handsome boy said with a disarming smile as he held his hands up, "I never said I wasn't. Hell, I was even worse than you back then."

They heard a rather loud shutting of the door and they turned as a very exasperated Harry Evans returned, shaking his head, "They don't want to come. They say that they'll stay. My oldest, Petunia, she isn't fond of the wizarding world. Her fiancé's only encouraged that. She flatly refuses to come."

Petunia came in then, and the three boys looked at her and wondered how she, so plain and thin, could be the sister of the stunning Lily Evans. Behind her came the large man, red-faced as Petunia looked at her father, "We'll stay Dad. I won't go to the house of one of _their_ kind."

James looked at the kitchen, and felt his heart crush as he saw Lily standing there, staring at her sister before turning and re-entering the kitchen without anyone else realizing she was there. Andrew Potter looked at Remus, as if asking if this was normal. Remus nodded quickly and Mr. Potter sighed, "I'd be more comfortable if you weren't here. But if you insist –"

For a moment he paused and the man, Vernon, said gruffly, "I ruddy well do. Come on Petunia, let's go back to the office until _they_ leave. We'll just be a little late."

Petunia nodded stiffly and Mr. Evans said hoarsely, "Dursley, you watch my daughter. Nothing's official until a date's set." Large face becoming a nasty shade of purple, Vernon Dursley nodded and left. Petunia looked at her father in horror and he softened, saying more gently, "Have fun Petunia. And be careful."

Face breaking into a smile that made her look at least _decently_ pretty, Petunia hugged her father quickly and left the room. Lily came, eyes shining and hard as she handed James and Andrew Potter two glasses of tea and left quickly, saying, "I'll bring yours out in a moment Remus, Black."

Harry Evans looked proudly after his daughter and then turned to Andrew Potter, who was sipping the tea appreciatively. "Very good. Your wife makes excellent tea."

Laughing, the man shook his head, "Oh no, she went to talk to Petunia. Lily made the tea. But yes, her tea's excellent as well. I married her for the tea."

"Oh, well, that's nice to know Harry dear," Mrs. Evans said as she walked past them, smiling as her husband winked cheekily at her. "Finish your tea Mr. Potter, and then we'll be more than ready to go." She came out a moment later, handing glasses of tea to Remus and Sirius, explaining quickly, "Lily's cleaning up. She'll be out in a moment."

Lily came out then, and James wondered if he was the only one who could tell she'd been crying. _Was it because of her sister_, he thought anxiously. As he took the portkey from his father and waited for everyone to touch it, he saw Harry Evans press a gentle kiss to his daughter's hair as Rose Evans held her daughter's hand as though Lily were still a child. _So they noticed too_, he thought in a breath of satisfaction.

James and Remus led the way as Sirius followed, talking easily to Mr. Evans while Lily and her mother talked lightly, quietly. Turning to his wise friend, James questioned curiously, "Is it always like that, with her sister?"

Remus nodded. "Wonder why she always hated that you got so upset about her being taunted? Because she's used to it. She gets beat down for being muggle-born in our world, and she gets disdain for being a witch in theirs. She's caught between two worlds."

"Merlin," James said softly, "why don't they get it? It doesn't _matter_. Isn't it enough that she has to deal with it at Hogwarts?"

Shrugging, Remus replied easily, "She's used to it. It's been six years since anyone's accepted her without question. She knows, about me, about all of us in fact."

Jumping, James stared at Remus, "How?"

"She's known about me for years, since second year. She found out about you three last year with the prank that Sirius played on Snape."

"Merlin, that was so stupid," James hissed. "And she hasn't said anything to anyone?"

Glancing at James, Remus shook his head, "Only to me. She's very good about keeping her word. She wouldn't tell someone else's secret unless it was hurting someone."

Looking back at where the delicate redhead stood laughing with her auburn-haired mother, James smiled appreciatively. Suddenly he felt a hand on his shoulder, "Now, if I catch you looking at my daughter like that again I just might have to hurt you. Even if I like you."

Laughing, James replied steadily, "Then I'd better get used to getting hurt, or you could get used to me looking at Lily like that; I do it a lot."

Harry Evans burst into laughter as Sirius and Remus laughed at James' nerve to talk like that to the tall, strong figure. "We're here!" Sirius announced loudly, throwing the door open and bounding in. Lily walked in last, eyes darting around the room to take in the beautifully comfortable and home-like house she was stepping into. She saw James' father, who beamed and called easily, "Eli! They're here!"

Assuming that he was calling James' mother, Lily stared in surprise at the woman who stepped into the room. Slender and beautiful, a woman with James' wildly messy hair in the form of long brown curls and playful brown eyes identical to those of her son stepped in. A warm smile overcame her clear and fair complection as she ran a hand through her hair absent-mindedly, just as her son always did. Extending the other arm, she spoke, her voice clear and rolling, "Hello. You must the Evans'. I'm Elizabeth Potter. Come in, make yourselves at home."

Within moments Harry and Rose Evans had left the room with Mr. Potter, talking comfortably and easily with the new family. James, Sirius, and Remus watched as the warm-hearted and almost saintly Elizabeth Potter brought Lily into the circle. "You're Lily, right? I've heard much about you. I do hope this isn't the last time you come down, it's not often I get another woman in the house with my lot."

Sirius grinned and came up to wrap his arm around her waist, "You know you love us Miss Eli. You love it when we're here."

Laughing, the woman reached up and ruffled Sirius' hair, laughing even harder as he immediately went to straighten it, "You're too much a charmer for your own good Sirius Black. You come and let me fall in love with another little boy, and then you have the nerve to leave." She turned to Lily and asked quickly, "Would you like to help me with something in the kitchen for a moment?"

Lily nodded with a smile and she watched curiously as James bent over and kissed his mother on the cheek fondly, asking, "Are you working tomorrow mum?"

Returning a kiss onto her son's cheek, she shook her head and led Lily into the kitchen. Lily was shocked to see the woman brush away a tear, and she stood quickly. Smiling, Mrs. Potter shook her head and said, "Oh, I'm okay. That stupid Black is most certainly too charming for his own good. It was easier when the boys were arrogant little idiots. Sirius moved in with us during the summer after your fifth year. He'd had enough of his family, and I don't blame him. I left their circle with no regrets. And then now, just after we got used to him being here _all_ the time instead of _most_ of the time, he gets up and moves out. Stupid little boy. I always knew I'd end up surrounded by them, but I didn't expect to get so attached to them."

Lily smiled as the woman laughed. Moving about easily, Mrs. Potter spoke lightly and easily, and Lily wondered at how wonderfully sweet and warm-hearted the mother of arrogant, overbearing James Potter was. With one long look, Elizabeth Potter sat in front of Lily and spoke gently, "James isn't that bad now Lily dear. You shouldn't judge him by how big of a fool he makes of himself in front of you."

Stuttering in shock, Lily managed, "How'd –? I didn't –? What on earth?"

Laughing, the vibrant woman stood up and began speaking easily, "I'm a legilimans. And about my son, he's really quite a nice mix of his father and me. If I may say so. He did manage to pick up some of our faults though, but we've always taught him to revel in human flaws. I'm afraid he's inherited my arrogance and his father's overpowering nature. But he's fiercely loyal and when he loves, he loves completely. I'm quite proud of him."

"But you're not arrogant."

Laughing, as she seemed to be doing so often, Elizabeth Potter shook her head, "Oh, but I am. I've just matured a bit since I was fourteen and fifteen and I've learned not to broadcast myself to others. I let them figure it out on their own. Quite unlike Andrew; he may be overbearing at times, but he's a saint in his own right."

Both girls jumped as they heard the deep chuckle. "Oh, so I'm overbearing? Well, at least I'm saintly. I just got an owl from Dumbledore. James is Head Boy. Thank Merlin he's taking after you and not me."

Lily watched with a smile as Elizabeth Potter kissed her husband fondly, and it was obvious that after years the couple was still helplessly in love. "I'd have rathered he take after you. But, if you're happy with it, I guess I can live with it." His laugh echoing in the kitchen, he kissed his wife again and left. Turning to Lily, Mrs. Potter asked lightly, "I'm going to go follow that one of mine. Would you tell James that he's Head Boy, and that his badge is with me? And tell the boys that there's food in the sitting room, please? I'm sure he'll be thrilled at the prospect of working with you."

The concept of James Potter being Head Boy suddenly struck Lily and she nearly grimaced. Walking out to where the three boys were sprawled lazily, talking and laughing, she said, almost monotonously, "Potter, you're Head Boy. You're mum has your badge. And she said that there's food in the sitting room."

Sirius whooped with laughter and declared with a grin, "You made Head Boy Prongsie? What was Dumbledore thinking? I'd have thought Moony, or Prewett. Ha! Now you actually have to be _good_!"

Snorting loudly, Remus contradicted easily, "Do you really think he will? And Merlin knows what _Dumbledore_'s thinking. We all know he's not exactly normal."

James laughed here as the second part of Lily's comment sunk in to Sirius. Jumping up as though electrocuted, he yelped, "Food! Moony, there's Potter food!"

With an undignified snort, Lily watched as Remus and Sirius raced out of room, calling Mrs. Potter ungraciously. She turned to follow when she felt a strong, rough hand grab her arm and spin her around. Looking up into James' face, she was surprised to see profound depth and intensity in his eyes. "Why do you hate me Evans? I get it that I was never the nicest guy around to you, but why do you hate me?"

Too surprised to think of what she was saying, Lily exposed a whole lot more about her feelings for the Marauders than James had expected to hear. "I never hated you. I hated how you acted, because I knew you, all of you, were above that. The pranks I could take; they never _hurt_ anyone. But how you treated people, especially Slytherins, made me so upset because I knew you're all above them, but you acted as badly as they did. You're not stupid Potter, you make higher marks than Gideon _or_ Remus, and everyone expected, expects, one of them to make Head Boy. I just hated how you lowered yourself, almost, for them."

His hand fell from her arm and he stared at her. Then he asked softly, "Why wouldn't you ever go out with me?"

Again surprised, she replied with more honesty and integrity than James thought should be allowed, "I don't know. Because I knew you're better than how you acted, and I couldn't let you think that I approved of that. You know how good you are, I know you know, but you never let yourself actually _be_ that good. I thought you figured it out."

Shaking his head, James spoke gently, "I never knew. I won't ask you out again for a while. But when I do, you'll say yes. Because if not I'll die."

Any other time she'd have snorted, rolled her eyes, and brushed him off carelessly. But now she couldn't, not when he looked at her so intensely with his hazel eyes so solemn and deep. She wondered how long a while would be, and said hesitantly, "Let's go see what they're all doing. I'm guessing your mum makes good food."

She sighed in relief as his eyes filled with his predictable playfulness; she knew what to do with the child-like James while she had no idea how to deal with the solemn one. His voice became light again, and his face glowed with pride for his mother, "The best. No one can beat my mum's cooking. Now, let's go."

* * *

"Lily! James is here!"

Her father's call causing her to jump up and brush her hair quickly one last time, Lily ran down the stairs and asked as she grabbed her wand off the top of the stairs, "Yes? Potter, what is it this time?"

Chuckling, James replied steadily, "Come on. Dumbledore wants us to get our supplies together. And you have your Apparation test today. My dad got us a portkey to get to Diagon Alley. Let's go."

Rolling her eyes, Lily said sourly, "I don't see the point, but okay." Kissing her father quickly on the cheek, Lily felt the newly familiar tug behind her navel and looked around her dark surroundings. "This doesn't look like Diagon Alley," she said shakily.

"That's because it isn't. Something's wrong. Stay close Lily." Had she not been scared out her wits, she would have snapped at him as he wrapped an arm around her waist and held her beside him firmly. She could hear his breath, unsteady and quick, and she knew he was as scared as she was. She heard a high cackle and then felt James' breath on her neck as he whispered, "Voldemort. Whatever you do, _stay behind _me. I don't want you getting hurt."

She felt her face go pale as she stared into the pale, almost unhuman face of the man who had once been Tom Riddle. His voice was a cold hiss, "Welcome, welcome. My friends in the ministry are certainly good. Delivering the Head Boy and Head Girl to me at once. A mudblood and a muggle-lover in such distinguished positions. Shame, what Hogwarts has fallen to."

Jaw clenched tightly, James hissed, "What do you want?"

"Well," Voldemort said, his cold voice sending tremors down their spines as they stared at his demonic eyes with hatred, "your allegiance wouldn't be refused, were it offered."

"No!" Lily spat, stepping beside James. "Never! I know what you've done, and I would _die_ rather than follow you!"

"But," the dark man before them replied, "would you rather take pain? _Crucio_."

As he finished the word James flung himself before Lily, a wild _no_ filling her ears before she heard his screams. "James," she cried, throwing himself beside his shaking and sweaty form the moment the curse ended.

He looked at her through pain-filled eyes, but his words and thoughts were elsewhere, "Are you okay? He didn't get you, did he?"

At that moment Lily understood something that she should have figured out three years before, that James Potter _never_ toyed with a woman's emotions. A man who loved his mother as much as James Potter did knew that a woman was something to be adored. Every time he asked her out, it had been in utmost sincerity, and she had taken it as another of his jokes. Shaking her head softly, she whispered, "No, I'm fine." Seeing the flash of relief in his face, Lily was filled with a new strength, and she stood before Voldemort and spoke firmly, "You will not get our allegiance. Whatever else you want, you may ask, though I cannot guarantee you will get that either."

He laughed a cold laugh that had her shuddering despite her attempts not to. "The only other thing I would have use for in a mudblood, however _pretty_ they may be, I'm sure you're not interested in."

Easily he reached out and touched her cheek with a long, pale, cold finger and she froze. The sound of scrambling behind her made her start until she felt James' hands come down on her shoulders and pull her back, "Don't touch her."

"How adorable. The muggle-lover has feelings for the mudblood. Now what I want from you is one thing and one thing alone, your death."

Lily shuddered and let out a breath she hadn't known she had been holding as James' hands tightened on her shoulder. His breath was ragged against her neck as he whispered in a low voice, "There are dementors behind us. Think of a happy memory, and say _expecto patronum_. If it works, it'll conjure a patronus and we can get out of here."

Nodding, she heard Voldemort's high cackle as he left, "I hear you've been working on dealing with dementors. But you most certainly are not ready for this."

He disappeared easily, and the two felt every bit of hope and happiness left in them drain away. Lily felt a coldness unlike anything she had ever experienced, and voices rang in her head. _Mudblood! You're nothing but **filth** Evans. You're a freak! My sister's a freak! Don't **ever** talk to me again! I hate you, freak!_ Breath ragged as she felt James stiffen beside and call _expecto patronum_ she watched the dementors come closer. _Happy memories_, she told herself firmly, and clinging onto what little she could remember, she cried out beside James, "Expecto Patronum! Expecto Patronum! Expec–"

The tall black cloaks surrounded her and she heard James' panicked voice and felt his hands grab her, "Evans? Lily! Lily! Oh Merlin, Lily!"

Blackness coated them both, though they could have sworn they heard familiar voices shrieking the charm they had just failed to execute.

* * *

"James? James, darling, wake up. Oh, my baby, wake up."

Lily's eyes fluttered open and her throat, surprisingly sore, stung as she managed, "What happened?"

Within moments the beautiful, and thoroughly worried Elizabeth Potter was at Lily's side, grasping her hand and saying, "Oh, you're okay. Thank Merlin. We were worried sick about you. Oh Merlin. Andrew got a tip at work that someone had tampered with the portkey, and he followed it. Remus and Sirius went with him and a couple other aurors. The dementors. They –"

Breaking off, she shook her head. With a maturity Lily had never expected, Sirius came and held her gently, kissing her on the cheek and saying softly, "He'll be okay Miss Eli. He'll be okay."

Nodding and wiping her tears away furiously, she turned back to her son as Sirius sat next to Lily and sighed in relief. "Thank Merlin. We were terrified Evans. James was still conscious when we got there, but you weren't. Merlin, you scared the life out of me. The dementors, they were trying to give you and James the kiss."

Sitting up and grabbing hold of Sirius' hand as she felt the world spin, she asked, "What's the kiss?"

She jumped at the sound of a loud snap and turned to see Remus handing her a large slab of chocolate, "Eat it; it'll make you feel better. The dementor's kiss is when a dementor tries to suck a person's soul out of their mouth."

Lily turned to look at James, where he lay white and as though dead and she asked, eyes wide, "Is he okay? They didn't get him, did they?"

A third voice came and Lily turned to yet another familiar face, "No, they would have if we'd shown up any later. Gideon said to make sure you were okay."

"Fabian," Lily said softly, her voice an echo.

The handsome man bent down and kissed Lily's forehead quickly, "In the flesh. Now rest Lily, you're bound to be exhausted. I'm going to Diagon Alley to get the supplies you and James need for next year. I'll tell Gideon and Marlene that you're okay."

Nodding, Lily, and Sirius and Remus, watched as Andrew Potter came in, pale and tight-lipped. He didn't even notice anyone, but went straight to his wife. Instantly her arms came around him and she said, "Oh dear Merlin Andrew. If you hadn't gotten there –"

Fiercely hiding any emotions he may have felt, he placed a finger on his wife's lips and said, "We got there, and nothing like this is going to happen again. James is strong, he'll make it. He has to make it."

Seeing the pain that her husband was going through, Elizabeth Potter's fingers curled into his cloak and she clung to him, "Andrew. Oh Merlin, Andrew."

Bending, he kissed his wife with an unrestricted passion. He wiped the tears from her cheeks and kissed her forehead, "I'm going to find out who did this. I love you Eli."

"I love you too Andrew. Be careful."

Smiling softly, Andrew Potter pressed another kiss to her forehead and left quickly. Turning Elizabeth Potter watched her son, white knuckles pressed to her lips in worry. Ignoring the rush of dizziness that swept her, and taking the arm Sirius offered, Lily stood as James stirred. "My baby," Elizabeth soothed painfully, brushing his messy black hair from his face, "it's okay James. James, darling, be okay."

"Mum," James asked, rather childishly, as his eyes opened.

Wrapping her arms around her son and holding him as though he was still a baby, and reveling in the fact that the young man clung to her as though he was a child, she said gently, "My baby. I was so worried about you. You're father, oh Merlin."

Sitting up straight, surprising everyone by his steadiness, he asked with wide eyes, "Is he okay? Is Dad okay?"

"He's fine James. He was just worried about you. I haven't seen him that worried in years. But it's okay. You're all okay now."

As Lily took an uncertain step forward, Sirius held her fast and guided her closer as James' eyes locked on his mother's face and he turned to get up, standing despite his shaky legs, "Lily. Where's Lily? Is she–"

He froze as he saw Lily, standing there with her guileless green eyes wide in her unusually pale face. Cursing Voldemort, dementors, and himself for the pallor in her face, he enveloped her in his arms and said throatily, "You're okay. Thank Merlin. I'd have killed him if he hurt you."

Surprised, Lily hugged him back, relieved, more than she felt she had the right to be, that he was safe. Suddenly she froze and looked up at him. "Why did you stay? You can apparate already; why didn't you just go?"

James stared at her, and it was obvious the thought had never even occurred to him. "I wouldn't leave you behind. Not for anything."

Sirius began to step forward when Elizabeth Potter and Remus both grabbed his arms and held him back. Leaning close, Mrs. Potter said gently, "They'll be engaged by the end of the year. Just watch. Merlin, he's so much like his father."

Laughing lightly, Sirius whispered playfully, "And you know you like that. After all, you _do_ like his daddy, don't you."

Clear complection suffused with a deep blush, she shoved Sirius and said, "You little demon. Don't you know to respect your elders?"

"I do," Sirius said with a wicked grin. "If I didn't, I'd have said this," leaning over, he whispered something into her ear.

Eyes going wide, she grabbed Sirius by the ear and said, "You even _try_ to say that again and I'll wash your mouth out young Black."

Winking at Remus, he opened his mouth again and began. Ignoring his yelp, Elizabeth tightened her grip on his ear and yanked him from the room. Remus chuckled softly at his cries and pleas for mercy, and later his screams of bloody murder. Walking in, Fabian shook his head and looked at the three, "That Black had it coming. I didn't know your mum had it in her Potter, washing his mouth out. He has to be a good half foot taller than her too."

"Ten inches," James said. "Same height as my dad. She's done worse before, believe me. What's going on Prewett?"

"Your dad's at the Ministry right now, trying to figure out what happened. Your mum let him know you're okay, and now he's mad as a hornet. He said that, unless you're up to it Lily, to cancel your apparation test."

Thinking of how much easier it would have been to apparate away, and that James would have been safe had they _both_ been able to, Lily shook her head. "I know how to do it, and I will. This wouldn't have happened if it weren't for the dammed portkey."

James smiled at her use of foul language as Fabian chuckled, rocking back on his heels, "Alright then Lily. Come on. Potter, Lupin, you two can come too. Or you can stay with Mrs. Potter. I think Black'll be coming too, by the sound of it."

They heard Sirius, grumbling about bloody murder, stupid soap, and mean Miss Eli. He stomped in loudly, glaring furiously at James, "Your mum killed me. And I can still taste that bloody awful soap!"

Lily looked down at what was left of her chocolate and held it up, "Here. Better than soap. It's bound to help _some_ at least."

Sirius grinned and kissed her quickly, ignoring the look of horror on James' face and shock on hers as he shoved the chocolate into his mouth. Remus, laughing, asked carefully, "What did you say to her that was so bad?"

Grinning, Sirius repeated his words through a mouthful of chocolate. James groaned as Lily snapped, very much like a mother herself, "You deserve to get your mouth washed out again for that kind of language!"

Blanching at the thought, Sirius shook his head and grumbled through a chocolate-y mouth, "Mo more thoap!"

Laughing, the five left to Lily's apparation test. Though the other three noticed, neither Lily nor James noticed when his arm slipped around her waist in a comfortable, natural, protective gesture. But they did notice, after passing her apparation test, that Mrs. Potter was sitting with Harry and Rose Evans in the Evans sitting room. Standing quickly, Mrs. Evans hugged her daughter and asked anxiously, "Are you okay? How do you feel darling?"

Smiling into her father's anxious face and her mother's worried one, Lily nodded, "I'm fine mum."

Before anything else could be said, Sirius asked, almost cautiously, "What are you doing here Miss Eli?"

Laughing, Elizabeth Potter squeezed the boy's hand and said, "I forgive you now Sirius. Andrew asked me to come by and explain what happened to Harry and Rose. Now, why did it take all three of you to see Lily home? Did Fabian go home?"

Lily shook her head and said, "No, he went to go get Gideon from Marlene's and bring them over. If you don't mind mum. These three insisted it would take all three of them to protect me if anything else happened."

Elizabeth Potter laughed before sobering. Her pretty face turned serious and she said, "Your father asked me to talk to you two, and Remus. He wants you both to know the Patronus charm, no matter what. He said that the moment you three get back to Hogwarts, he wants Remus to teach you. You know your father James, so don't give me that look."

"Why me?" Remus asked, eyebrow arched in confusion.

"Because you're better at tutoring than Sirius or Gideon. And because Andrew was impressed with your patronus. Fabian Prewett was too; he's actually the one who suggested that you tutor them. You can do it Remus dear."

Remus smiled sheepishly and Rose Evans stood up and asked cheerfully, "Who wants to stay for dinner? Go ahead and stay Elizabeth, and go ahead and tell Andrew to come over when he's done with his work."

Mrs. Potter looked uncertain for a moment, but seeing the joy on James, Sirius, and Remus' faces she relented and nodded, "Thank you. I'll go home quickly and leave him a note so he knows. I'll be back in about ten minutes."

She winked at James and disapparated. As she disapparated they heard two crashes in the kitchen, and a very familiar voice snap, "Gideon, get off of me! Come on, Fabian said she'd be home!" With a laugh, Lily threw herself at an unsuspecting Marlene McKinnon, who began laughing as she asked, her eyes bright, "How are you? What happened? Why aren't you sitting down?"

A tall, robust young man with light brown hair beamed at Lily and said, "We were all worried about you until Fabian said you were okay. Marlene, stop fussing." He turned to James, Sirius, and Remus and smiled slightly, "Thanks. Fabian said you took good care of her."

Rolling her eyes, Marlene looked at them and smiled, "Ignore Gideon. He's just sore because he had to help his mum clean up the house today while Fabian was out and about. Hi Mrs. Evans! Hello Mr. Evans! Where's Petunia?"

She glanced around anxiously and Harry Evans laughed, "Don't worry Marlene, she went to have dinner with Vernon's family. She left about ten minutes after Eli came by."

Gideon muttered something darkly and received a loud slap in the back of the head from Marlene, "Watch your language Prewett."

Glaring at her as Sirius laughed, he snapped, "What, you know I'm right. Oh, Mrs. Evans, I could have _sworn_ I heard the words stay and dinner as we came in."

Lily rolled her eyes and shoved him onto the couch, "You're being an arrogant pig Gideon. Yes, you can stay for dinner. James, Sirius, sit down. Remus, what are you doing?"

Remus pointed to the cat at the door and said, "You have a cat?"

Laughing, Lily shook her head and said, "No, my owl's upstairs. That's our next door neighbour's cat. It doesn't bite, I promise. Go home Ginger."

The cat meowed and walked out. Marlene laughed and looked at Remus, "Are you scared of cats? Gideon, dear, what _are_ you doing?"

The attention shifted to Gideon, who straightened and asked, "What? What do you mean? I was asking Lily something. So, what do you say Lily?"

"Ask her yourself you brute," she turned to James and asked curiously, "Why am I surrounded by idiotic men?"

Sirius exclaimed in jolly indignation and James winked at her and sat down beside her, "Are you calling me and Remus idiots Lily?"

With a smile, Lily shook her head, "I guess you two I'll accept as not _complete_ idiots."

Gideon sat back from the couch across from where Lily sat with James and Sirius. His light grey eyes were cold and calculating as he watched them. He started as Marlene sat down beside him, and his whole demeanor softened. Remus and Sirius exchanged glances and looked at Lily, who nodded and smiled as she leaned back. Then the two looked at Gideon, who smiled and nodded as James' arm wrapped around Lily's waist, again as though it was completely natural. With two very undignified snorts, Remus and Sirius went and sat directly between the two overly comfortable pairs. In the kitchen, Rose and Harry Evans laughed and contemplated the two couples they had also observed.

Voice low, Harry spoke to his wife with a grin, "You guessed Lily and James what, three years ago? What about Gideon and Marlene?"

With a laugh, Rose kissed her husband quickly and said, "Three and half, when Lily wrote me a long rant about how the Marauders all acted horribly when she knew they were capable of better. Gideon and Marlene, when didn't we see something there? What could possibly make us jump to _that_ conclusion?"

"Other than their arguing incessantly the way we used to Rose dear? Or Gideon's inordinate overprotectiveness of her when he merely glares at any guy he sees with Lily? Or maybe it's the fact that their families have been close for forever and a day, it seems. Or, maybe Rose, it's that their parents have been talking about it with us for almost seven years now. I don't know, maybe we're just geniuses."

Laughing happily, Rose explained to a very bewildered Elizabeth Potter standing in the doorway, "We're merely contemplating the relationships of our daughter's best friends, and our daughter and your son."

"Oh," she said with a laugh, "I gave our two until they graduate. Andrew just got home, but he said he'll be over in a moment. Need any help Rose? I'll go take some water to the kids. And no, Harry, you can't give my son the threatening speech just yet."

As Harry Evans laughed, both the Evans and Potter parents felt the tug at the realization that their children wouldn't be only theirs much longer. With a jolt they turned to see Andrew Potter brushing off his pants and catching a vase. Steadying it, he smiled sheepishly and said, "Sorry about that. Are the kids okay?"

Laughing at her husband's anxiety, Elizabeth kissed him fondly and said, "They're fine. They're all out in the sitting room. Go on, talk to them. James asked about you."

The moment Andrew walked into the room James jumped up and hugged his father, ignoring the fact that it may have seemed awkward, "Dad!"

Laughing, Andrew winked at him and asked, "Better then James? How about you Lily, are you okay? I would have stayed to make sure you were okay, but I had some business to take care of."

Gideon opened his mouth, to ask if it was more important than the health of his son and Lily, but he shut it as he saw the fierce protectiveness and control in the eyes of Andrew Potter. For an instant Gideon Prewett, Marlene McKinnon, Sirius Black, and Remus Lupin wondered what the story of Andrew Potter really was. But that ended as he turned to Remus, "Remus, did Eli tell you what Dumbledore and I decided? That you'll be tutoring James and Lily on the Patronus charm?"

Remus nodded and James gaped, "Dumbledore? Mum only mentioned you and Prewett, the older one."

Laughing, Andrew nodded, "I suggested you two get some help in dealing with dementors, because we haven't seen the last of them. It was Prewett's idea to use Remus. But Dumbledore approved it all."

He sat and began talking easily with the six until Harry came in and said, "Fine business there Andrew, leaving me with the wives. Dinner's ready."

With loud whoops, Remus and Sirius darted towards the kitchen while Gideon and Marlene walked off arguing. Lily went towards her father, who hugged her quickly. But his eyes were hard when he said, "Don't take it lightly Lily. You too James. He went after you once, and he'll do it again. Don't stop at the Patronus charm. You'll need to be able to deal with more than just dementors before this is over, I'll wager."

Lily nodded and as Harry Evans called his wife and sauntered off, Andrew Potter spoke, "You're father's a smart man Lily Evans. And you're a smart girl. And remember, the Patronus is a shield, not only for dementors. And even if you don't use your patronus, being able to call a happy memory can _always_ have it's uses. Make them for yourself, both of you, because you'll be in need of plenty soon enough."

_The patronus_, Lily thought as she walked into dinner, _is going to destroy my study habits and free time with Marlene and Gideon. But it'll save my life._

_The patronus_, James wondered as he followed Lily and his father into the dining room, _is going to create a whole lot more complications than we expect. But I'll see Lily._

* * *

A/N - Hope you liked it! 


	2. Chapter 2

A/N - Glad you liked it! Sorry it took so long, but here it is!

* * *

For the next, and final, few weeks of summer Lily Evans hardly had time to breathe by herself. It became a daily event for James or Sirius, often with Remus and even Peter, to stop by and check on her. And that did _not_ include Gideon and Marlene spending more time at her house than at their own, or when she went out with any one of them. And today was it, the final day. _No, _she corrected herself, _we're leaving today. Back to Hogwarts_. She snapped out of her reverie as Gideon appeared before her, lifting her bad and saying, "Come on Lily. Marlene's on her way, and Potter's pacing downstairs. They're going to drive me insane."

Lily laughed and walked downstairs with Gideon, wondering what life would be like without her best friends. Surprised to see not James, but all four Marauders in her sitting room, Lily grinned sheepishly at her father. From the corner she heard Andrew Potter's deep chuckle and she turned to see both him and Elizabeth Potter sitting together quietly. "Don't look so surprised to see us; it makes us feel unwanted," Sirius teased lightly as Marlene burst in, her father following with her trunk.

With a laugh, Lily shook her head, "Oh, it's not that too much. I'm more surprised that Petunia hasn't thrown a fit about it yet. Dad?"

Harry Evans laughed and winked at his daughter, "No worries Lil. She's still upstairs. And there are six eighteen year olds in my sitting room with my daughter. And five of them are male. Why on earth did I ever agree to sending you here instead of some nice girl's school?"

Grinning cheekily, James replied, "Because you knew I'd be here to watch over her."

"My daughter's safety is in your hands?" Mr. Evans asked with a raised eyebrow. Throwing his hands in the air, he exclaimed, "That's it Lily! You're not going back!"

Understanding the blatant insult instantly, the room erupted in laughter, James included. Gideon smiled and said, "You let her go because you knew Marlene would castrate anyone who came within fifty feet of her, and Lily sticks with her out of habit."

Marlene shot Gideon a dirty glare and he reached out and ruffled her shoulder-length brown hair. At this moment Marlene's father eyed the young man warily and Harry Evans burst out laughing, "That's it! Now, Rose, instead of rolling your eyes at me, you could always get me a cup of tea."

With a laugh, Rose shook her head and looked at Elizabeth, "Does yours do this too?"

As Elizabeth Potter nodded with a smile, the three fathers looked at each other and asked simultaneously, "Does your wife do that too?"

The kids all looked at each other and laughed. James winked at Lily and grinned, "Don't worry Lily-flower, I won't ever do that to you."

Lily gave one of her trademark shriek/moans and Marlene laughed, saying, "James, don't bother her so much. And if we want to make the train, we'd better get going."

"Grumble, grumble, grumble. Can you ever _not_ tell us what to do?" Gideon muttered darkly, still rubbing the back of his head from where she had smacked him earlier.

Edward McKinnon shook his head quickly at Gideon and said, "Bad idea. _Really_ bad idea Gideon boy. Especially today, when she's obviously not in the mood to deal with you."

Gideon paled slightly, but he smiled charmingly at the stunning Marlene. Laughing, Sirius threw an arm around her shoulder and kissed her on the cheek, "Now, Marlenie darling, be nice to Gideon. It's not his fault that he knows nothing about how to treat people."

Laughing, Marlene shoved him lightly and asked, "And you do? Now, be serious Sirius."

"That," the young man said with a smile, completely oblivious to Gideon's crushed expression, "is something I can do. Especially for the beautiful miss McKinnon."

Lily couldn't help but laugh, but she felt guilt writhing in her gut when she saw the flash of pain in Gideon's eyes as Marlene squeezed Sirius' hand affectionately. Her voice was brisk and every bit the Head Girl she now was, "Alright, enough fooling around. We're going to miss the train if we don't leave now. Let's go. Bye Mum, bye Dad, I'll write you once we get there."

Rose Evans kissed her daughter on the cheeks as her husband hugged his daughter fiercely. "All right," he said gruffly. "And I expect a visit for Christmas. Have fun. I love you Lily bird."

Smiling at the childhood nickname, Lily said softly before apparating away, "I love you too. See you soon."

The group, the seven seventh-year wizards, ran onto the Hogwarts Express and shoved themselves into the only empty compartment they could find, pleased to see that there were any left empty at all. The four Marauders shoved themselves onto one side of the seats as Gideon sat squarely between Lily and Marlene. Before too long candy and chocolate was bouncing between the teens, and laughter and jokes abounded. For the first time that anyone could remember, Lily Evans was not only sitting with the Marauders, but enjoying their company. Lily watched with a wary eye as Sirius flirted openly with Marlene, who responded to his advances carelessly with light smiles. The strong smile of Gideon's that Lily loved so dearly flickered, though nobody but Lily saw it. To the others it was completely out of nowhere when Lily said quickly, "Gideon? Will you come outside with me for a moment? I want to talk to you about something."

Gideon's eyes locked on hers and he stood, his voice gentle, "Of course Lily. Anything for my flower."

As the two walked out James glared at the door and let his head snap towards Marlene, "What's going on between them? Is there anything going on between them?"

Marlene, eyes wide, shook her head in confused response, "They never mentioned anything. But, then again, they've been having all these little unspoken conversations lately and I have no idea what it's about. Lily would have said something if–"

Eyes shining with sadness for a moment, Marlene cut herself off. Remus, ever the practical one, said reproachfully, "You have no right to get jealous now when you've been sitting next to Gideon and ignoring him to flirt with Sirius for almost an hour. Had you been like James, who focussed all his attention on Lily, I could understand it. But not when you blatantly turned away from him."

Anger flashing in her eyes to hide the sadness, Marlene snapped, "He's one of my best friends! And I never said I was jealous! I'd just be _surprised_ if there was anything going on there. They've always acted like brother and sister, but they've been a lot closer this summer than before. I just didn't think to see it coming."

James sat silent, his eyes rivetted on the door. Remus looked between him and Marlene and wondered if there really was something going on between Lily and Gideon. If there was, they would both have to answer to a very upset pair of friends.

"Gideon, look at me," Lily said softly.

...> ...> ...> ...> ...> ...> ...> ...> ...> ...> ...> ...> ...> ...> ...>

"Merlin, Lily, does she not get it?" Gideon's voice was hoarse, raw and pure in a way that he only ever allowed it to be with Lily. "Can she really not see anything? I thought I was being obvious, or at least that she knew. And why Black? Of all the people to flirt with, why _Black_? Merlin, it would've been easier if it was Potter or Remus. Why the one guy who'll flirt back and take her up on every flirt?"

Lily's face softened and she wrapped her arms around him, saying gently, "She's just playing. She doesn't mean it, I promise. There will never be anything but friendship between Marlene and Sirius. I'm sure of it. Don't worry Gideon, it'll be okay."

Gideon buried his face in her hair and wrapped his arms around her for comfort. "Merlin, I hate him Lily. I tease her and she slaps me; he teases her and she laughs and holds his hand. Am I doing something wrong? I know she doesn't mean it, but Merlin, I hate him for it. I hate him for it more than I can even begin to explain. But I can't hate him Lily, it's not his fault for Merlin's sake! Merlin, he's always been like this, and he always will be, I think. That's part of the reason everyone likes him, dammit, that's part of the reason _I_ like him. He's been my friend for almost seven years, even if we were never close, and now I keep on hating him because _she_ keeps on showering him. Lily, we've been best friends for seven years, _seven years_, and she doesn't even realize it. Why doesn't she _see_ it already?"

At that moment Lily's heart went out to her best friend. "Oh Gideon, I know. Believe me, I know. Hold on, I'm going to go get my wand from the compartment."

The handsome boy stood tall and strong and Lily felt a burst of pride as she thought he looked like a warrior king. She entered the compartment not to the jokes and laughter she had left, but a tense silence. Marlene spoke first, "Where's Gideon?"

Unable to look her best friend in the eyes, and cursing her for not seeing how much Gideon liked her, Lily rummaged through her bag, "Outside. I'm getting my wand and going with him to check on some of the younger kids."

The silence reigned again before James said, his voice pained, "Is there anything going on between you and Gideon, Lily?"

Now Lily turned and her face softened as she looked at the young man who had managed to win his way into her good graces after a mere month. "I know you care James; I don't doubt that anymore. And you know perfectly well what I told you two weeks ago, and it still stands. But as far as Gideon is concerned, would anyone here _care_ if he _was_ with someone?"

Though Remus and James both caught the crude hint, Marlene paled slightly and said, "He's outside, right? Just outside the door, by himself?"

Lily said nothing, but Gideon stepped in and said, "Having trouble Lily? Don't worry about it, I have my wand with me just in case. Let's go, I want to stop and talk to someone about Hogsmeade before we get back. Merlin, why's it so quiet in here? You'd think someone died."

Holding up her wand, Lily shook her head, "No, nobody died. But a couple of people decided they had an interest in places they don't belong. Potter, will you meet me in the prefect compartment in about twenty minutes? We need to talk before all the prefects get there."

Gideon saw instantly that Lily was tense and he bent and kissed her on the forehead easily before tugging lightly on Marlene's hair and saying, "Don't look so upset Marlene. I'll be back in a couple of minutes. I'm just going to help Lily with her rounds."

He noticed instantly that Marlene looked up at him and nodded, her face still bland. He was half out the door when James spoke, "Wait a minute Prewett. You go ahead and stay, I'll go with Lily."

Shrugging, Gideon replied, "You come too; there's plenty of room. But I need to talk to her about something for a little sometime during the rounds. Come on Potter."

Instantly realizing that Gideon was telling him that he could come and see for himself there was nothing between Gideon and Lily, James nodded and stood. "And I'll be on my way when you do. Let's go Lily flower."

The three left and after a _long _silent pause Marlene stood up, "I'm going to find him. He hasn't talked to me properly in at least a month. I'm going to find out what's wrong."

She left the compartment and ran, knowing Gideon and Lily would have headed towards the front of the train. Without realizing where she was going she felt herself slam into a tall, hard figure. She fell back and felt a large, strong hand catch her and she looked up into the coldly handsome face of Rodolphus Lestrange. "Well, well, well. Getting prettier every year McKinnon. I think you could do quite nicely with some _nice_, _pureblood_ wizard instead of that mudblood and muggle-loving riffraff you associate with. In fact, I might just take myself up on that."

Pulling herself away and cringing inwardly with disgust, Marlene retorted icily, "Lestrange. I would rather do _anything_ than associate with people like _you_. You can kindly get away from me now. I was looking for someone."

Lestrange took a step towards her and spoke in a throaty voice laced with desire, "No can do McKinnon. You see, I decided I liked you. You're certainly pretty enough, and a pureblood at that. And, you see, if I decide I want something, I get it."

His hands grasped her arms and pulled her taunt against him. She fought violently, resisting the urge not to retch in revulsion. "Let me go! Let me go, dammit!"

Cold and cruel was his laugh as she felt his breath, hard, on her face. Before she had time to slap the face she hated so much, his lips were on hers and he was taking though she refused to give. She pulled away and fought madly, knowing exactly what this man was planning to do as his hands drew her hard against him.

She could feel his breath on her neck when she heard a voice that seemed to her heaven-sent, "Get your filthy hands off of her."

Lestrange froze at the sound of the strong, powerful, dangerous voice of Gideon Prewett. He was no fool, and only a fool would mess with a man like Prewett. "Well, well. Nice to see you Prewett. Have fun with the mudblood? Or do you prefer this whore? Let's make a deal, I get one, you get the other. Take your pick."

Tall and menacing, Gideon stepped towards the Slytherin, his grey eyes glowing with anger, "I'll take that one, if you will. And she's not one of your strumpets, no matter how much you'd like her to be. Just try to take Lily, just try. I'm sure James Potter, as Head Boy, will have a couple of complaints about it though."

Then Lestrange saw where Lily stood with James, his hand resting lightly on her waist. Swearing softly, he said coldly before walking off, "Hogwarts has gone to the dogs. A muggle-  
lover and a mudblood as Heads. Next we'll be admitting werewolves, vampires, and giants."

Gideon turned to Marlene and said gently, "Are you okay? Did he touch you?"

She nodded before tears began to leak from her eyes. Instantly Gideon had reached out for her, and she recoiled, saying frantically, "Don't touch me! Don't touch–"

With lightening speed, Gideon wrapped his arms around her anyways and held her to him firmly as he whispered tenderly, "Hush, hush Marlene. I've got you. You're safe now. Nothing's going to happen to you; nobody can get you now."

"Oh Merlin, I was terrified. He was so close."

She could feel Gideon's arms tighten around her and she knew without seeing that his strong, sharp jaw had tightened as he said firmly, "You're safe. Nothing's going to happen now. He can't get you anymore. I won't let him near you again."

For some reason this struck a core through the girl and she buried herself into his arms, sobbing silently. She could feel him pressing light, gentle kisses to her hair as she trembled violently. Yet she knew she was safe, she knew that Gideon had spoken honestly, and he wouldn't let anything happen to her.

James looked at Lily, neither of them realizing his hand still rested on her waist. "How serious is he about her Lily?"

With a sideways glance at her two best friends, Lily turned to face James, "He's in love with her. He'll marry her, if she lets him. That's why he's never been able to have a girlfriend after more than one date, because Marlene won't approve of the girl unless it's me or her, and he won't approve unless she approves. I would say that he'd die for her, but he wouldn't. He'd kill for her without batting an eyelash."

Seeing how the tall, handsome man held the shaken girl to him despite the murder gleaming in his eyes, James nodded. He had known Gideon most of his life, and had lived with him for seven years; he knew the man well enough to see the truth in Lily's words. But he turned to where she stood, caught between watching and being unable to. "Do you mind? That it's Marlene, I mean."

He stopped, unable to finish, and Lily turned to him. She smiled softly, "It's what I always wanted. For them to be together. Marlene and Gideon are meant for each; they're each two pieces of a single puzzle. They've always been. I just never realized how awkward it would be if they ever actually got together. The three of us were always fine; there was never a third wheel. But, if they _dated_, the way they should, there would be. I still want them to be together, it's just an unpleasant slap by reality."

All he did was lay a light hand on her arm, but she froze. Ignoring the alarms that told him not to do anything, James pulled her into his arms for a gentle hug, saying gently, "You'll never be a third wheel Lily Evans. Nobody will ever be able to push you aside. And if they want to go out, you know where I am. If worst comes to worst, we'll chaperone."

Laughing and nodding, Lily squeezed his hand and walked over to where Gideon stood with Marlene. She touched Marlene lightly on the shoulder and said gently, "I'm going to go down to the Head's compartment. You stay with Gideon; it'll be okay."

Gideon released Marlene and held Lily's face in his hands. James and Marlene both tightened as they watched him bend and kiss Lily's forehead, whispering so that only he and Lily could hear, "Everyone eventually gives into Potter. He has his mother's charm. And he has his father's fierce loyalty. You're safe with him. You're safer with him than you'll _ever _be with me. Remember that. And love him Lily, because he needs it more than you know."

Smiling, Lily kissed his cheek and said, "Watch her. And good luck."

Giving Marlene a last reassuring smile and gentle hug, Lily ran off with James, standing by his side as though it was perfectly natural. Marlene watched Gideon as he watched Lily, and he began to speak even before he turned back to her, "He's going to marry her. And she's going to fall head over heels in love with him. Lucky bastard. They're going to be happy until the day they die. And they'll die together too, just watch."

Eyes rivetted on his face, she said softly, "Why do I have the feeling that you're _really_ jealous of him?"

"Because I am," Gideon said softly, turning away from her again, only because he couldn't bear to watch the woman he loved when she looked so uncertain and pale, "because he's going to get the girl he already loves when I'm not so sure."

"Is it Lily? Are you jealous that he has Lily?"

Gideon whirled around as Marlene finished, eyes wide with shock, "Where on earth would you get an idea like that? Lily's like my sister. You're my best friend! I'd have _told_ you if it was Lily! You know that!"

Taken aback by his vehement surprise, she snapped defensively, "I know. But you haven't even talked to me lately Gideon! How would I know when you haven't even sat down to have a decent conversation without jumping up to go talk to James or check on Lily! How on earth do you expect me to know anything when you don't even look at me when you talk to me anymore!"

There were tears glistening in her eyes now, and Gideon froze at her words. He cursed himself as the worst man in the world before he stepped closer. Taking her face in his hands, there was no doubt he was looking at her as he said, "I'm looking at you now. And the thought of going to talk to Lily Evans or James Potter is not on my mind. It's all you now Marlene. My only interest now is you."

She swallowed and stepped back, ready to rage at him for unnerving her merely by his closeness, "Merlin, Gideon, for nearly a month the only thing I've heard out of your mouth is either making fun of me or about Lily. What else am I supposed to think, when you go and hold Lily like she's your angel and shove me around like when we were six! I've been at your house everyday with my mum or dad, and I've hardly even seen you. Why? Because you were always off with Lily or James or Sirius or Lupin or somebody! You've hardly even looked straight at me in weeks! And when you have it's been to tease me about something!"

Dragging his hands through his hair, Gideon looked at her appraisingly. "How can you even think that Marlene? When I say one thing to you and you slap me and then when Black goes and says the same thing you laugh and hold his hand? I can't look at you, not when every other time I see you it's with Black hanging all over you, and you enjoying it! Is it any wonder I've been with Lily? For the love of Merlin, Marlene, I've been teasing you since we were you six, and it never bothered you until now!"

"You never worshipped someone else while you were teasing me," Marlene's voice was soft, pained. She knew he was right, Sirius Black _had _been all over her, and she had let him.

"I can't tease Lily now," Gideon replied, his steely grey eyes brimming with emotions that Marlene had never seen before, "not when she's the only one who listens and understands. And not when I'm watching her fall head over heels in love with a man who's been in love with her for years. And not when Fabian comes home every night and tells me about another muggle-born who's been attacked or whose family has been killed. Not when I'm terrified it'll be her next. That's why I've been talking to Potter, because he knows just as much about it as I do, and he'll die fighting for her. And that's why I've been with Lily whenever Potter can't, because he's the only person I trust with her life. I don't want to see anyone I care about die before I do."

Suddenly indignant that he wouldn't trust Lily with her, she demanded, "Why not me? Lily's my best friend too, and I'd do anything not to see her get hurt!"

She jumped when Gideon's hand clamped like steel on her arms. His eyes were hard as he said, "No. Oh Merlin, do you not get it? For all that I love Lily, I'd rather watch her _die _than see you get hurt. How do you not understand?"

He let her go sharply and turned away, shuddering at himself. Marlene touched his arm and asked softly, "Gideon?" She understood now, and she wondered how she had missed it before. It seemed painfully obvious, but she had been painfully oblivious.

"Don't touch me," his voice was harsh, but it lacked conviction. "I'm not sure if I can trust myself with you. Not now."

Here she hardened, refusing to take his self-refusal, and she snapped, "If I can't trust you, then I can't trust anyone. Don't be an idiot. Look at me."

He turned to her, and she smiled at him. Shaking his head, he came and grasped her arms, looking down at her, "You're so dense. You're so unbelievably clueless. And you thought I liked Lily. When, in fact, I'm in love with her best friend."

Throwing her arms around his neck, Marlene reached up and did something she had wanted to do more than half of her life. She kissed Gideon Prewett. And he responded. He most certainly did. His hands tightened on her arms and even when he broke away he drew her closer, "Marlene McKinnon, you are the most oblivious woman I have ever met. And, Merlin, I love you for it. Kiss me again, and it let's make it official."

Looking up at him, and smiling at the storm brewing in his sharp grey eyes, she whispered, "Gideon, I may be oblivious, but you're a fool. It was always official, you just never caught on. Dear Merlin, Lily was right, I fell in love with my best friend without ever realizing it. I'll kiss you, but only if you kiss me back Gid."

A small chuckle on his lips, he closed the gap between them and kissed her again. His thoughts were simple, but oh so good, _this year is going to work out quite nicely. Especially if I get more of this._ As the two walked down the hall he reached out and ruffled Marlene's silky hair, laughing as she punched him playfully in the arm. _Oh yes, _he thought, _this year is going to work out perfectly._ He reached out and tickled her, laughing as she jumped and laughed, fighting him off. Only a moment it lasted before he gathered her in his arms and pressed an idle kiss to her forehead, the way he had always done. But this time his lips lingered a little longer, and it wasn't the hand of a brother that squeezed her waist gently.

He followed her into the compartment and kissed her quickly as he sat, winking at Remus and grinning at Sirius' stunned expression. As Lily stepped back into the compartment, her words were so swift nobody has time to comment on the fact that James' arm was wrapped possessively around her waist, "Well then? Is it settled? Have you two gotten over your stupid denials and gotten together? Good, it was about to drive me mad. Peter, will you go sit with them, I like teasing them and it's easier if I can see what they're doing."

Peter laughed and obliged, winking at Lily as she sat between James and Sirius. Leaning back, she watched her best friends with a wary eye and warned, "Just so you know, I'm not going to go easy on you just because you're my best friends. I catch you two snogging, and you'll suffer the same consequences as everyone else."

Gideon laughed and stretched, leaning back comfortably as he said with an ease his four roommates had never noticed, "You say that now. When you're off snogging the pants off of Potter you'll think twice. It's a beautiful thing Lily, it really and truly is. And I don't think Potter has any objections to it. So it's up to you Lily, right Potter?"

Not replying to Gideon's question, James leaned forward and asked in a stage whisper, "It sounds good, doesn't it? Lily, right Potter. Right, Lily Potter. It really sounds right."

Lily shoved James over so he landed squarely in Remus' lap. Recoiling and nearly throwing his best friend onto the floor, Remus cried, "God's sake man! Go sit on someone else's lap and leave me be! It is _not_ on my list of things to do to have you lying on my lap! Lily's right there Prongs!"

Shaking with laughter, James straightened, sat back, and stretched, his arm falling idly over Lily's shoulder. Peter and Sirius eyes the arm warily, before exchanging uncertain glances. Neither were too fond of the idea of sharing James, or letting Lily into the group. Wasn't it enough that they were friends with Lily, Marlene, and Gideon now? Did they have to deal with a relationship too? Still, they watched as neither James nor Lily noticed the presence of his arm around her shoulders. But even they didn't notice the longing in James' eyes as they left to let the girls change, nor did the notice the wistful eyes of Lily Evans as she watched him leave.

It was Lily's wistful eyes that would go unnoticed. And by the time they were noticed, it would be what some would call too late. But _they_, they who called it too late did not know James Potter. Nor did they know of the schemes running through the minds of Remus Lupin and Gideon Prewett. But they would. Oh, believe me, they would.

* * *

* * *

* * *

Stepping into the carriages that were to take them to Hogwarts, the seven teenagers talked and laughed. As Lily and James sat to the side, discussing Head duties and the new prefects, Remus nudged them and whispered, "Remember. You two have to make time for learning the Patronus charm. Prongs, you're going to have to work around quidditch practices and your rounds. Lily, help him figure it out, will you?"

James groaned and looked at Lily, saying, "Do we have to do this? Can't we just figure it out before we go to bed?"

Lily looked at him with a raised eyebrow and said, "We'll pull it off, don't worry. We can do rounds after your practices, or right around the sessions. It's only once a week Potter, and that's not that bad."

"Back to Potter are we Lily?" James asked. "If you like the sound of my last name that much, you can have it. I have no problem with you being Lily Potter."

Rolling her eyes, Lily asked softly, "Will you ever grow up? Come on, we're here."

She stepped out after everyone, but right before James. She strayed back a little, looking thoughtful, and James reached out and placed his hands lightly on her shoulders. He held her still as he bent forward and whispered gently, "I was kidding you know. I have no problem with figuring out how to manage lessons with Moony. I didn't mean to bother you by teasing you about it. And don't worry, you're going to be a wonderful Head Girl."

Turning, Lily looked up at James and said, "I know James, about you joking. I've known you long enough to be able to tell the difference, most of the time at least. But thanks anyway. You weren't supposed to listen to me, you know. When I told you to grow up."

Squeezing her shoulders lightly, he released her and fell into step beside her, "I didn't grow up because you told me to, Lily. I grew up because I realized _you_'d be the one who would have to deal with the consequences. See the difference. I didn't grow up because of you, but for you. And it's only the first of many things I'll be doing for you, I promise."

It was then that Lily did what many considered the unthinkable. Though it was known that Lily didn't _hate_ James, their rocky and rather _bad_ relationship was widely known. Throwing her arms around him, she kissed him on the cheek and said, "I wasn't sure what Dumbledore was thinking when he made you Head Boy. Now I don't think he could have made a better choice."

Crimson, James mumbled, "Come on, they might get worried."

"Who?" Lily asked curiously. "Your friends will sit and contemplate what we might be doing, and waiting to blackmail us about something we didn't do. And mine will be completely oblivious to anything but each other."

Grabbing her arm, James pulled her into the Great Hall and moaned, "So? Do you always have to be right Evans?"

Raising an eyebrow at him as she sat, she teased, "What, back to Evans now are we Potter? I thought you were the one stuck on changing my name."

Growling at her as he shoved himself into the seat between her and Peter, he snapped, "Shove it Lily. Oh, look, little first years."

Seeing the devious glint shining in the eyes of all four Marauders, Lily groaned and smacked her head on the table. When she lifted her head at last, she turned to Gideon beseechingly, "Please, dear God, help me."

Quickly alleviating the mischief from James' eyes, Remus said coolly, "First lesson is on Wednesday, or so Dumbledore said. Just thought you two might want to now."

Leaning over, James whispered in the ear of the girl whose life he had already saved once, "Back to the Patronus. It sounds more like a disease that a saviour right now."

Shoving him lightly, Lily looked at him incredulously. "James Potter! You won't be saying it when it saves your life."

Face tightening, James murmured darkly, "I don't give a damn about my life anymore. But I'll praise this charm, and Moony, if it saves yours. Do you understand me Lily?"

Reaching under the table as the sorting took place, Lily squeezed James' hand gently. Doing what he had wanted to do for over two years, James linked his fingers in hers as he sat, more at ease than he had been in weeks. Sirius noticed, and it was Remus he exchanged glances with this time. Remus' words were unspoken, but Sirius heard them clearly, _he's still your best friend Padfoot. You're not losing him, you're gaining Lily._

James looked at Lily, at her face features lightly sprinkled with freckles and her wide, sea-goddess green eyes. Feeling his heart pound in his chest, he smiled and vowed that he would win her this year, no matter what.

_The patronus_, he thought in satisfaction, _will win me Lily. And if it saves her life, I will get down on my knees and praise the patronus, whatever shape it may be._

_The patronus,_ Lily thought as she forgot about her hand in James', _that's what I'll do. No, I won't be a third wheel, James was right. When they go out I'll be with James and Remus. I think I could get used to this. And I'll see James._

_

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A/N - I hope you liked it! Review, _please_!


	3. Chapter 3

A/N - Sorry that took so long... I'll have the next chapter up, hopefully, within a week. Hope you like it!

* * *

The first patronus lesson had not gone well. Enough said. James had done better than Lily, which had surprised them both considering Lily's undeniable superiority at charms. Though nobody said anything about it, Remus had the uncanny feeling it was because James had stronger happy memories. He _wouldn't_ say anything to Lily about it, and he left them at the portrait hole, saying quietly, "Night Lily. See you later Prongs." 

Lily nodded and James waved absentmindedly. They began walking down the halls, their patrol an uneasy silence. Suddenly James spoke up, his voice a weak shadow of hopefulness, "Well, that was just the first time. It's bound to get easier, right?"

With a shrug, Lily continued walking. As James laid a hand on her arm she whirled around, exclaiming desperately, "Why doesn't it work James? Dammit, this is the _seventh_ year I've been here! Why is it I don't have anything strong enough for this?"

She opened her mouth to continue, and James forgot to think. Leaning down, he closed his mouth over hers, his arms wrapping around her waist as she clasped his arms. Though she didn't think of _who_ she was kissing, Lily wondered why a hand squeezed her heart and made her feel like breaking down and crying though she had never felt happier. James broke away quickly and turned away slightly, one hand still gripping her arm. He could feel her eyes watching him, questioning, and he said uncertainly, "I don't want to hear you talk like that Lily. I didn't know what else to do."

She followed him as he began to walk, and her voice was soft, "Next time, telling me to shut up usually works. Just in case it happens again."

James laughed and looked back at her, his brown-hazel eyes twinkling as his laughter echoed in the empty corridor. Watching him, Lily wondered why she felt so lightheaded and still wanted to sit down and cry. Pushing it aside as she gnawed her lower lip, she allowed James to pull her into light conversation, laughing every few minutes despite the confusion bubbling inside her. Turning to her, James said, "You know, if anyone had told me I would be patrolling the halls with you and actually having a _conversation_ this time last year, I'd have laughed at them."

"Last year we only talked in passing," Lily reminded him easily.

"Gideon made sure of that," James mused, remembering countless times the boy had reminded Lily of something she had said she would do, and watched her grab Marlene, run off, and leave Gideon winking at James and following her.

Shrugging, Lily said mildly, "He liked being able to hear out of both ears."

James burst into laughter and ruffled Lily's hair, saying lightly before asking curiously, "I love you Lily! That's great! Oh, and Sirius wanted me to ask you when the first trip to Hogsmeade is. When is it?"

_I love you Lily_. The words shot through her and she felt her insides knot painfully. _He's not talking to me,_ she told herself sternly, biting back tears that threatened to overwhelm her. _He's just saying that. Because I made him laugh. He doesn't really love me. This is **James** we're dealing with. And why should I care anyway. It's not like I'm **falling** for him or anything. We're just friends._ She looked at James, who didn't even seem to realize what he had said, and she forced a smile, "I can't remember exactly. I'll check and tell you tomorrow morning."

James grinned at her, completely oblivious to why her eyes were shining so brightly. Lily followed him easily, saying an easy goodnight as she headed towards her dormitory. And as she fell asleep, the tears she had managed to restrain for so long trickled over her cheeks.

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* * *

Lily sat with Gideon and Marlene, rolling her eyes as Marlene snorted into her juice and smacked Gideon. Like she did every morning, Lily looked up as the Great Hall filled with owls, and she identified the Potter family owl easily. Wondering what it was that they had to tell James, she started as the owl swooped down to her and dropped the letter in her eggs, nipping her finger before flying off. Rescuing her letter from the mercy of her eggs, she opened it and spoke lightly when she felt James' calloused hand fall heavily on her shoulder. So he had noticed the owl as well. "It's from your mum. There's a letter to you in here too."

She handed James the piece of parchment addressed to him and continued to scan her letter. Looking up in surprise as James' hand tightened on her shoulder, she asked curiously, "What happened?"

"Merlin," James said. "They've sent my dad after Voldemort."

Lily stood up quickly and demanded, her eyes going wide, "What? Why?"

James tossed the letter to Sirius, who was watching them curiously and shrugged, "Because my dad's the best they've got. And because my dad has a history of coming out of things alive. Merlin, this close to Christmas too. Mum must be going out of her mind."

Sirius and Remus scrambled to their feet and Sirius said softly, "I'm staying with you until your dad gets back Prongs. Shit, what were they thinking? Your mum actually let him go, what the hell was she thinking?"

"Padfoot," James sighed, "you know my mum wouldn't ever keep my dad from doing anything. She'd just yell at him and pretend she doesn't care. Moony, you alright?"

Remus' voice was just above a whisper as he commanded easily, "Stay tonight. You don't need to be out until dawn tonight thinking about it. I'll be okay."

Lily stiffened and said, "Remus, don't be a fool. It'll take his mind off of it. Besides, Sirius and Peter can't take care of you alone. James, come on, we've got to get to potions. It'll be okay. Your dad knows what he's doing."

Following her, James took her hand in his as he muttered worriedly, "That's what I'm afraid of. That they'll know too."

* * *

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* * *

James Potter stood quickly, eyes glittering as Professor McGonagall said gently, "Potter, calm down. You'll be able to go see Professor Dumbledore in a few minutes."

Sirius, Peter, and Remus had all followed James' example, eyes wide, while Lily slowly raised herself from the couch. "Calm down?" James grated, using every ounce of strength he had not to yell. "Calm down when I've just found out my father's been attacked? I want to see him."

Gideon and Marlene, who had come to see James staring in the face of one of their teachers, jumped. "What?" Gideon echoed. "Mr. Potter was attacked?"

Hissing, Remus growled, "Prewett, hold it. Prongs is upset enough as it is."

Sirius' voice was steady, though his face was pale, "I'm coming with you Prongs."

McGonagall looked at him with her cool steady eyes, "Professor Dumbledore strictly said that the only other person allowed to come would be Miss Evans, if she chose to."

Grabbing Sirius' hand quickly as he growled, Lily shook her head, "I'm coming Professor."

James' face was white as McGonagall said gently, "I'll come get you when the Headmaster sends for you. Wait here Mister Potter."

The moment she left James began to shake. "They got Dad. Sirius, they got my Dad."

"I'm coming with you Prongs. I won't sit here."

As the messy head of the Head Boy fell into his hands, Lily grasped Sirius' hands so that the boy gasped and glared at her. Her voice was soft, a threatening low, "Sirius, don't. James can't deal with McGonagall now too. I'll tell you everything, I swear it."

"Swear it," Sirius growled. "Tell me every word, every dammed word."

Lily nodded and turned to James, wrapping her arms around him gently. His voice was so low that only she could hear his anguished words, "Merlin, my dad. I'll kill every one of them who did this to him."

As the two Heads left after McGonagall, Gideon said coldly, "We'll find out who did this. Fabian'll find them. And he'll kill them for it. And I'll help."

James looked back at his roommate with eyes so haunted that his friends jumped.

Lily stood looking at James, wondering how it had happened that they were left alone in Dumbledore's office. Tears shone in the tall boys eyes and she took a step towards him. His arms shot out and he grabbed her, asking brokenly, "Dammit Lily. I can't take this anymore. I don't know what else I can do. Will you take me, or not?"

Understanding his passion was borne of anxiety, Lily wrapped her arms around him, nodding as she soothed, "I already did James. I thought you knew. But now's not the time. Don't worry; it'll be better." With a strangled sob, he buried his face in her neck and cried, something he hadn't done for years. Pressing a gentle, reassuring kiss to his cheek, Lily whispered, "Go see him James. Go see him and your mum. They need you."

Nodding, he asked gently, "Wait for me? Be here when I get back?"

She nodded and shoved him towards the fireplace gently. She herself bit back tears as he disappeared in a flash at the fireplace. It didn't require a sixth sense for her to know that she would be doing a lot of waiting for James Potter. She sat, waiting, and felt her heart rip out of her chest as he came back, his face pale and eyes haunted. Instantly she was up, holding onto him and saying gently, "James, it's okay. He'll be okay. Come, let's go. You need to sleep some."

James nodded mutely, but he reached up and kissed her, quickly, gently, heartbreakingly. Lily walked with him in silence. She watched as he walked up the stairs to his dormitory and felt tears trickle over her cheeks.

* * *

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* * *

Remus shrugged and said, "Well, that's it. No more lessons until after the holidays. I think I'll shoot something if we do."

"You'll shoot something?" James asked incredulously. "What on earth do you think _I_'m going to do if we have to practice?"

Grinning impishly, Remus countered easily, "Well, you and Lily are both making some progress. You especially, Lily. What's your memory?"

Sending a sly smile his way, she said easily, "You don't need to know that. I'll keep that to myself, thank you."

"And Padfoot," Remus snorted, following the Heads out of the room, "because apparently he knows what it is."

Laughing quickly, Lily said, "If he guessed it, then I'm not going to deny it."

James looked sideways at her and said, "Oh, so you'll tell Padfoot but not me."

"Nope," Lily teased quickly, walking backwards before them as she relented, "I didn't tell him. He might have figured it out, but I never told him what it was."

Rolling his eyes, Remus parted from them and said, "Look, I'm going to go see Madame Pomfrey. See you later."

The two waved and sent him on his way before heading back to Gryffindor tower. In the nearly empty common room, where Sirius sat bent over an essay, completely oblivious to them, Lily stopped James. Concern in her voice, she asked gently, "Are you okay? You've been quiet since your dad was hurt."

"I'm fine," James said shortly, unwilling to discuss it, even with her.

"Are you sure?" Lily questioned gently, sincerely worried about him. "He's going to be fine. You know that he'll be fine. The healers said they guaranteed an easy recovery."

"I know that," he snapped irritably, oblivious to the hurt that surfaced in her eyes. "I said I'm fine. Go sleep Lily. See you tomorrow."

Lily watched as he turned and walked off without giving her so much as a smile. Something about the coldness of the subconscious gesture hurt her more than harsh words would have. She jumped when she heard Sirius say softly, "Lily, come here."

He had stood and he looked down at her when she closed the gap between them. Shaking his head, he said easily, patting her on the cheek with a reassuring smile, "He's just preoccupied. He's crazy about you; you know that. He'll start paying attention to you again once Mr. Potter's better. Trust me on this one."

Grinning weakly, Lily nodded, "I know Sirius. Thanks."

She turned to leave and Sirius grabbed her wrist, stopping her as he said, "But it still hurts, doesn't it? To be rejected by him _after_ you finally accepted him."

"He's so cold," Lily said softly, surprising them both by relenting and opening up to the boy.

With a shrug, Sirius attempted to support his best friend, "Prongs is like his dad in that. He can be like that, when his mind is elsewhere. Don't worry about it. Once his dad's better he'll be back to normal. Now, go to sleep. I'll wait up for Moony, but you go up."

Allowing herself to be enveloped in a brotherly embrace, Lily smiled at Sirius and spoke as she started up the stairs to her dormitory, "Thanks Sirius."

* * *

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* * *

James, holding tightly to Lily's hand, darted down the corridors, Sirius chasing after them. The three froze and James' eyes went wide as they heard the strong, familiar voice, "Eli, dear. Fudge is in a panic, and Crouch is outraged. And Dumbledore, Alastor has been on my back since I got back."

James burst into the room, his voice loud, "Dad!"

Andrew Potter stood quickly, hugging his son and saying with a slight smile, "James. Dai said you came by. I hope you didn't worry."

"Only everyday," Sirius said, clinging like a little boy as James' father hugged him as well. "Dammit, we were worried out of our mind."

Smiling, Andrew shook his head, "No need. It was foolishness on my part. Moody's signed me out until the second week of January. So unless something big comes up, I'll be home for Christmas."

Elizabeth Potter joined her husband quickly and kissed James, saying gently, "So I've been praying every night that everything goes smoothly. Aren't you three supposed to be at Hogsmeade?"

Nodding, Lily said softly, "James overheard Professor McGonagall saying something about you being here. He wouldn't hear of going to Hogsmeade until he saw you."

Smiling, Andrew nodded to Dumbledore as the Headmaster slid away. "Why am I not surprised? Coming home Friday James? Lily, we talked to your parents already. You're coming over on Christmas Eve instead of going with them to Dursley's and we'll be going to your house for New Year's."

With a cheeky grin, James nudged her and said, "Like that Lily? The first of many Christmases together."

"Oh, now what is this?" Eli said, one eyebrow arched over the other. "Did you forget to tell me something James?"

Laughing, Sirius said, "Oh, did he not mention it Miss Eli? He's been drilling it into our heads to make up for it. Right Lily?"

Shaking her head, Lily looked at Andrew Potter and asked, "Will they ever grow up?"

It was Elizabeth Potter who spoke, "This one didn't. Nope, I don't think any of them do."

"Good," Lily said, smiling. "I don't think I want them to." Yet, even as she spoke, she looked at James and wondered if it was she who had changed so quickly. Praying that this wasn't a new James Potter, she let herself be brushed aside by the man who claimed to adore her. Hiding the tears that threatened to gloss her eyes, she murmured almost inaudibly, "I really don't want them to."

* * *

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* * *

Lily walked into James' house, surprised to see him standing beside his mother, his hand tight on her shoulder. She watched as Elizabeth Potter shoved his hand away and snapped, "James, stop it."

She began walking away and James followed her, saying worriedly, "Mum?"

Elizabeth Potter turned and commanded fiercely, holding herself from yelling, "James, enough. Do you understand me?"

Whirling around, she walked back out and Sirius looked at Lily, explaining quickly, "They called Prongs' dad back in. Odds are he won't be back for Christmas."

They heard a voice come from the kitchen, and Lily excused herself, leaving as a tall blonde man came in. "Dammit," he said. "James, where did your mum go?"

James shrugged, "I don't know. She wouldn't let me go after her. D'you know about Dad and everything, Dai?"

Nodding quickly, Dai sighed and said, "He told me before he told your mum. He didn't want to go, but he wouldn't let Eli see that. Not when he knows how much _she_ doesn't want him to go either. But he'll be back for Christmas. He hasn't left her alone for Christmas yet, and there have been worse years than this at the Ministry. Now, I'm going to go find your mum. Eli!"

He turned and saw a flash of brown hair and he darted. James and Sirius watched as he grabbed Eli and demanded, "You, come with me. I want to talk to you."

Jerking away from him, she tossed her hair and snapped, "Well I don't want to talk to you. Go away Dai. I'll come by and see Gwen later today."

"Eli!" Dai cried angrily, whirling her around so she faced him. He softened then, taking her chin in his hand and saying, "You're coming with me. You can talk to Gwen later, but you're talking to me now. Let's go. Up. We'll be back before dinner, so you'll be with your boys. They're standing at the door; they know where you are. Come on Elizabeth, don't make me beg."

Sighing, she nodded and followed him away, "Alright Dai. Just for a little."

James' shoulders slackened in relief as his mother apparated away with his godfather and he looked at Sirius, "Oh well. I guess it's just us until Moony and Lily get here. What do you want to do Padfoot?"

Giving James an arch look, Sirius said coldly, "For someone who claims to like Lily so much, you certainly haven't been paying much attention to her lately. She came in and left while you were preoccupied with your mum. I never thought I'd be saying it Prongs, but you're not being fair to her mate. Since your dad got hurt and Lily said okay. It's his job mate; he's been doing the same thing since before you were born. Your mum's used to it; she's just sore because it's close to Christmas. And after complaining and groaning about Lily for so long, you have no fucking right to be closing her out just because you have her now. I'm going to go talk to her."

James stood, stunned, as Sirius turned and walked out. "Padfoot," he began, but the words died on his tongue as Sirius kept walking without even looking back. He wasn't being cold, he knew it. There was just a lot of things going on with his dad now, and he didn't want to burden – _Dammit_, he thought, _Padfoot's right. Dammit, how the hell am I going to fix this one?_

He stalked out, waiting to find Sirius and Lily, or whichever he got to first. However, he ran into Remus. Grinning, he said, "Hey Moony. You're early. Have you seen Padfoot or Lily?"

Laughing, Remus nodded, "I just saw Lily. She said she had to go somewhere, and to tell you she couldn't stay. Did anything happen to her parents or Gideon? I was just with Marlene, so I know she's okay, but Lily looked pretty upset. And Padfoot's right behind you mate."

As James turned, Sirius asked quickly, "Hey Moony, where's Lily?"

Raising an eyebrow, Remus shook his head, "I swear, you two share a brain or something. I saw her when I was coming in. She said she had to go somewhere. Really. And Padfoot, if you don't clean up your room, I swear I'll kill something. I went to get something out of there before I came and I nearly broke my neck. How do you live in that?"

Grinning sheepishly, after sending James a particularly nasty look, Sirius shrugged, "It's usually not that bad Moony. I just haven't had time to clean it lately."

Looking between the two, Remus sensed something was going on and shook his head, "Yeah, in the two hours you sat doing nothing yesterday. Look, both of you, I don't care what happened, if you two start going at it I'm leaving. It's about Lily, isn't it? I don't want to know. As long as Padfoot hasn't magically developed an interest in her, I don't want to know anything."

Snorting and choking down a laugh, Sirius tossed his head back, "No worries about that one Moony. I'd sooner eyeball my mum," at that thought he shuddered and then straightened. "Nope. Just worried about her. Now, let's go. I have other things to worry about."

* * *

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Lily looked up and commented lightly, "It feels empty without Mr. Potter here."

A small smile lit Elizabeth Potter's pale face as she said, "It always feels empty without him. He's never missed a Christmas yet. But he said he might be back by tomorrow though."

James stood, unable to look at Lily. They hadn't spoken for nearly a week, and even the preoccupied Eli could feel the tension. Suddenly she stiffened as a dark shadow filled the doorway. She knew him before they could even make out his face, and his name was on her lips as she launched herself into his arms, "Andrew!"

James stiffened as Andrew Potter laughed, loud and free, and swung his wife in an arc, kissing her passionately as he brought her down. As he looked down at his wife, Lily realized she had never seen his face so light and unrestrained. "Did you really think I wouldn't make it? It's Christmas Eve Elizabeth! I'd have gotten here earlier, but I had to pick something up for you at Dai's house on my way, Eli."

Sirius laughed as Eli's face lit up. The difference it had made, merely seeing her husband in the doorway, was astonishing. Her face was flushed and her eyes were bright and she was radiant. Lily watched, feeling unusually out of place as Andrew hugged James, his own face glowing with pride and affection. She looked up, startled as she felt Sirius' hand come down on her shoulder. In his face she saw an out-of-place expression not unlike what she felt, and she smiled as he spoke gently, "The Potters got married on Christmas Eve, the year Prongs' grandmother died. It's always been special for them. Mr. Potter wouldn't have missed it for the world. I'm surprised it took him so long to get here, in fact."

Laughing for the first time in days, Lily grinned up at him and said, "That's why Miss Eli was so preoccupied. It wasn't _just_ Christmas for her."

"Exactly," Sirius nodded, pleased that she had understood so easily. "At first I expected that, because of that, they wouldn't want Prongs around as much. But it's the other way around. Mr. Potter lives for them, Miss Eli and Prongs, and neither he or Miss Eli would stand for having Prongs left out. The first year I spent Christmas here I felt horrible, like I was intruding. Now I only feel even remotely like that when Mr. Potter comes back from somewhere. Because then, unless you're _really_ family, they forget you. The only people I've seen them acknowledge then are Prongs' godparents."

"And you," Lily pointed out, remembering how Mr. Potter had hugged Sirius when they had seen him at Hogwarts.

But somehow, this time it was Sirius who hung back, not the Potters who forgot him. He seemed to realize this and he just shrugged mildly. "It's not the right time. Not now, not when there's so much. And not when I'm still trying to pull _myself_ together."

"Why aren't you with Remus or Peter then?" she questioned curiously, intently wondering why he hadn't spent Christmas with one of his other best friends if he was so out of sorts with this one.

"Moony's with his parents. I would have gone with him, but it's not nearly full moon and his mum hasn't been feeling well. And Peter's gone to France with his mum to see his aunt. They invited me along, but I thought I was staying with Moony then. So it was either here, or with Gideon and Marlene. Personally, I'm more comfortable here even with everything. And I didn't want to stay at my place alone."

"That's perfectly understandable," she replied easily, letting him steer her out of the room and into the sitting room where the Christmas tree stood.

Surprise overwhelmed her as she felt herself swept into strong, lean arms and whisked away, as Andrew Potter called over his shoulder, "I'll be back with her!"

Beginning to laugh, Sirius watched as Elizabeth Potter came and whispered into his ear, "He'll fix it. He loves her and James too much to let it slide. And we love you too much to let you watch it and wish you could do something."

Eyes shining in surprise and awe, Sirius hugged her and muttered, his voice catching in his throat, "Thank you Miss Eli. I love you too."

Tossing her hair back, she laughed and said, "Merry Christmas! And Sirius, dear, come with me to get some chestnuts. Andrew'll want some by the time he brings her back. And James, darling, come help me make some hot chocolate. Merlin knows they'll need it with how cold they'll be!"

Setting her down, Andrew Potter arched an eyebrow in a way that showed what an influence his wife had been on him. "Alright. Now that they're all gone, what's wrong? Why does the little girl who was always smiling suddenly look like she's about to cry? Especially so close to Christmas. I don't like people crying at all, ever, and on Christmas I feel even stronger about it."

Lily shook her head, "Nothing. I'm okay. I was just surprised. I didn't know you'd come back."

Tilting her head up, Andrew made the young woman look at him, surprising her by the intensity of his deep blue eyes. His voice was gentle, and Lily knew why even Sirius clung to this man; he was a father. "Don't lie to me Lily. I've listened to James complain and rant about you and how much he likes you since he was thirteen years old. And I've watched you run around for over six months. I'm not speaking to you as James' dad, but as a father altogether. I've grown fond of you for _you_, not because James wanted me to. What happened between you and my son that's hurt you?"

Unable to stop herself, tears trickled over Lily's cheeks. Everything spilled out, the abandonment, the irrelevant glances as James had turned and walked away without talking to her, and the fact that it was all done without him even noticing, without him even caring, that it made her hurt. That there was something about it that had stabbed her when she had least expected it. She didn't see the whiteness in Andrew Potter's face, or the tension in his jaw, but she felt it as he wrapped her in his arms. It was the arms of her father and more, for this man wasn't on her side merely because she was family, he was going against his own son for her. Unconsciously she understood that, and her fingers curled into his robe as she cried.

Seething, Andrew Potter wondered if his son had even stopped to think about what he was doing. Bending, he pressed a kissed to the forehead of the young girl who had taken the place of the daughter he had always wanted. "Lily, look at me." She looked up, her face streaked with tears, and she now noticed the strict control that kept him from snapping. "I'll talk to him. If he doesn't do it himself, then I'll fix this for you. Now listen when I say this. Regardless of what happens, the doors here are open _whenever_ you need it. You, like Sirius, are a part of this family now whether you like it or not. Okay?"

Nodding, Lily let herself cling to him as he held her again. He wiped the tears from her eyes and spoke gently, "Now, you go wash your face, and I'll go talk to Eli. Then we'll have chestnuts and hot chocolate, if I know my Eli."

As Lily walked into the bathroom she could almost feel the warmth of Mrs. Potter's hot chocolate, for she knew exactly how well Mr. Potter knew his wife. And Elizabeth Potter knew her husband just as well, for she left the two boys in the kitchen and met him halfway there. She saw the tension in his face and she reached up and kissed him, easing as much of it as she could. His voice was shocked, strained, "Eli, our son is the biggest senseless brute on the face of the planet. He hurt her and didn't even realize he was doing anything wrong. Honestly, I could tell there was something wrong with them at Hogwarts, when we saw them. And our idiot son didn't pick up on it."

"He didn't know Andrew." Eli soothed him gently, fingers running over the line of his jaw as she crooned, "He was too caught up in that he had her. And he was worried, he didn't understand. You know him Andrew, you know how much he cares about her, you know he wouldn't knowingly hurt her. Talk to him, love, just talk to him."

Digging his hands into her unruly hair, he drew her towards him fiercely, kissing her with a barbaric passion that had her winding her arms around him. As he released her he buried his face into her hair, saying, "Merlin, what would I do without you? I'll talk to him. But I can't guarantee I won't yell at him too."

Reaching up, she kissed him quickly and turned to wrap an arm around Lily's shoulder, for the girl had just stepped in. Her voice was light, mild, and cheerful as she winked at her husband and said, "Then yell at him. Merlin knows the boy needs it. You haven't yelled at him nearly as much as a father has the right to yell."

Andrew grinned as he watched his wife steer his soon-to-be daughter into the kitchen. Bounding into the kitchen after them, he declared loudly, "Alright! I know I missed dinner, but it's never too late for presents!"

Sirius laughed, wondering what sort of trick Andrew Potter had for them this year. Lily's jaw dropped and she managed, "But it's not Christmas yet! You can't open the presents before Christmas morning!"

Bursting into laughter, Andrew threw his head back and grabbed his wife. He kissed her, a full, blood pounding kiss on the mouth before releasing her and leaving her to explaining, "We always open one present on Christmas Eve before we go to bed. It's nearly midnight, so we'd best open that one present and get to bed so we can be up early tomorrow."

Wrapping an arm around Lily's shoulders yet again, Eli led her to the Christmas tree as the two boys jumped to their feet and followed Mr. Potter after the girls. "Andrew's presents tonight," Eli said with a grin, beaming up at her husband, who stood behind her as she sat on the floor before the tree. "Lily, come here. You pass out the presents."

Feeling like a little girl again, Lily did so, momentarily forgetting the tension between her and the man she was dating despite it all. Sitting, Andrew pulled his wife into his lap and said, "Sirius, James, you two first. Go on, take a look."

James eyed the lumpy package warily, and waited for Sirius to open his present. Sirius opened the tiny little box and gaped. His eyes went wide and his face became as eager as a child's. Ignoring all thought of manliness and pride, Sirius whooped and flung his arms around Andrew Potter before dashing out the door and laughing, long and hard. Like a little boy rather than a young man, Sirius dragged the motorcycle inside and did a little dance around it. James began to laugh, long and hard, before he managed, "Merlin, Padfoot. Dad, you bought him a bike?"

"Only half of it," Andrew explained. "Sirius wanted a motorcycle, and I told him I'd found one. So he gave me the money, I pitched in the other half and bought him a flying one. And I told him it wouldn't get here before New Year's."

Eli's face went pale and she looked at her husband, "It flies? You bought him something that flies?"

The room erupted in laughter and Andrew Potter nodded with a laugh, kissing her and saying, "Just wait until you see what I got James."

"Not a flying car, please not a flying car," Eli begged under her breath, though she too began to laugh as James' lumpy package fell open.

"A suit," James said, his jaw dropping in disbelief. "Not even dress robes. Dad!"

Laughing heartily, Andrew said, "Don't stop now. Look at what's underneath."

Knowing, despite his disbelief and shock, that his father wouldn't _only_ give him a suit for Christmas, he moved the suit carefully out of the way. A roar of laughter ripped past his throat and he threw the robe over himself, disappearing as he did so. Though they couldn't see him, they could hear his happy laughter as he exclaimed, "A new invisibility cloak! Yes! You gave me a new one! I never thought I'd get another one aftermy oldone got lost!"

Thrilled beyond what even Andrew had expected, James danced around the Christmas tree before throwing his arms around his father. Lily's eyes were wide and her face danced with laughter as she said, "Open your present! What did you get?"

Winking cheerfully, Andrew brushed the request lightly past him, "I already know what I got. Dai gave it to me when I stopped by earlier. It isn't quite as grand as their presents, but I needed a new camera since mine broke last month."

"You got a new camera?" James roared, jumping to his feet. "Where is it?"

"Right behind you," the man laughed easily, watching as he son jumped to take a picture of Sirius hugging his new motorcycle. "Now, Sirius, be careful. James has the camera, and you know he'll use a picture like that for blackmail. Come on away from the bike. Eli, love, your turn. Open it."

Sliding out of her husband's lap, Eli set the relatively small box on her lap and opened it. She groaned and glared at Andrew as a slightly smaller box slid out. Impatient now, and knowing what to expect, she tore through three more boxes easily before she caught her husband's sharp look. The three teenagers could almost hear the pounding of her heart as she opened the third box and the velvet jewellery box that lay within it. Bright eyes wide, she stared in open-mouthed wonder as the crimson tear-drop pendant hung from a delicately linked gold chain. The necklace simply melted into her hands and she clutched it to her, looking up at her husband as though she was a little girl rewarded with candy. Laughing, Andrew slid down beside her and pried the necklace from her possessive fingers, fastening it on her. His hands lingered on the back of her neck and he pulled her to him, kissing her long and hard.

Eli leaned back against her husband, content with his arms around her waist and his lips against her hair. Perfectly happy with his wife tight against him and her hands on his, Andrew beamed at Lily, "Go on, you still have yours. Open it and we'll all get to bed."

Nodding obediently, and still stunned by the extravagant present he had gotten his wife, Lily opened the little box and pulled out a plush velvet box of her own. Her head snapped up, her green eyes wide in her face, and he nodded encouragingly. She gasped and looked up at him again, her fingers curling intimately around the little box. "Let me see," was Sirius' immature cry as he threw himself beside her, smiling broadly as he saw the ring.

Lily removed it easily and stared at it as though she wasn't sure if it was really real. James slid down before her and beamed as she stared at him in shock. The pendant of a lily on a thin gold band was stunning, but even more breathtaking was the encryption on the inside of the ring. _Death may eventually do us part, but know that you are always in my heart. I love you Lily, James_. Andrew spoke easily, ignoring the shock on both the faces of Lily and Sirius, "James found it a couple months ago and said he wanted to get it for you. I told him not to, but I copied his encryption and went and got it behind his back. But the bracelet he got you isn't shabby either. Or the three books."

"Dad!" James groaned.

She was supposed to be mad at him, she told herself. But how could she be mad when he flushed like a little boy and showered her? Something tugged at her heart as he looked at her and slipped the ring on her finger uncertainly, a look in his eyes that begged forgiveness. It was Christmas, she told herself, she could let it slide, at least for tonight. Flinging her arms around his neck, she clung, and even she realized it as James held her desperately as though he was afraid she would disappear. He pressed his lips to her hair and groaned as his mother clapped and said, "James, Lily, you're under mistletoe! You're under the mistletoe! Give her a kiss James!"

Cupping her face in his hands, James whispered so only they could hear, "I'm sorry. I love you."

Then he kissed her in a way she could never remember being kissed. She felt all the rejection and pain melt away from her. It was impossible for a man to kiss someone with that much love and _not_ adore the object of his affection. As he broke away, Lily nodded and felt her heart burst with happiness as James' face glowed with a joy beyond what any material gift could have ordained. Pressing a kiss to his wife's cheek, Andrew whispered, "I guess I don't have to yell at him now. Smart boy. I knew I raised my son to be sensitive."

Raising an eyebrow, and wondering if he knew he was directly contradicting what he had said earlier, Eli nodded warily, "Of course Andrew. Of course."

The two watched as James, Lily, and Sirius disappeared up the stairs. Andrew led his wife up after them, the two completely oblivious to the fact that the three were hidden beneath James' new invisibility cloak. Laughing, Andrew said easily, "You look like a giddy two year old. Merlin, Elizabeth. Will you ever grow up? I love you."

"Oh, you're one to talk, you big baby," Eli taunted, running her tongue teasingly over her upper lip. "You haven't changed since you were sixteen."

The three felt their eyes widen as Andrew ran a hand possessively down Eli's side and said, "Merlin, with a woman that looks like you do around, how could I? I'll have you now."

Laughing, Eli wrapped her arms around his neck and looked up at him, "Oh, will you now? Alright then."

She kissed him then, a kiss that had Sirius leaning over and muttering, "Looks like Miss Eli's having fun."

James elbowed him and went dead white as Andrew Potter looked at his wife with smoky eyes. Voice husky with desire, he said, "Merlin, Eli, if you keep that up I'm going to forget the bedroom's down the hall and have you right here."

"Oh, will you now? I'd like to see that."

"Dammit," Andrew swore, lifting her into his arms and pressing a kiss to her hair. He groaned as she kissed his jaw and managed hoarsely, "Dear Merlin Eli."

Tossing her hair back, Eli let her husband carry her off as she said with a teasing laugh, "You're like good wine Andrew, you get better with age. Merry Christmas."

"Bloody hell," Andrew moaned and slammed his door. The three teens in the hall burst into silent giggles as they heard Elizabeth Potter's gasp and Andrew Potter's supremely satisfied voice as he laughed, "Who's seducing who now Eli? That's what I thought. Merry Christmas love."

The invisibility cloak slid off of them and Sirius chuckled, "Bloody hell. I didn't think your dad had it in him Prongs."

"I didn't _want_ to know he had it in him," a very white James moaned.

Lily laughed and said, "You knew all along. Even _I_'ve seen them kiss often enough."

"So? They're my parents! I don't care to think about what they do behind closed doors. Kissing's different. It doesn't involve any wrong images."

"Well, your dad _is_ very a good look–" Lily began with a cheeky grin.

James' hand clamped over her mouth and he shook his head fiercely. "Don't even say that. That's beyond wrong."

"Would you rather me say I like his son much better?"

Sirius smiled as James wrapped an arm around Lily's waist, pulling her to him, and said, "Now, that I don't mind. Forgive me then?"

Lily nodded and smiled as James' face erupted in relief and he kissed her. Laughing quietly as he kissed Lily again, he whispered in her ear, "Now _this_ is a patronus worthy memory."

Smiling at him, Lily said gently, "Any memory with you is."

A hand eased on his heart and he felt a tug deep in him as he smiled and said, "Oh, Merlin, I love you Lily. Merry Christmas."

"Merry Christmas, my patronus."

The two began to laugh there as Sirius rolled his eyes and stage-whispered a goodnight. "Merlin, Lily, that was beyond pathetic. Merry Christmas."

"You know you liked it James."

Kissing her again, James followed Sirius into his bedroom and said, "If you're involved of course I like it. Goodnight." She whispered a farewell and slid into her room. The two young loves, reunited under the magic of Christmas and loving parents, thought thoughts that would have shocked them in their similarities.

_The patronus,_ James thought as he laughed and threw a pillow at Sirius in his room, _is officially my best friend. I could have sworn it kept me from losing Lily._

_The patronus,_ Lily wondered as she curled up on the bed, looking at the ring Andrew Potter had given her for James' sake, _where did that come from? Oh, this is the best Christmas ever. I could have sworn it kept me from losing James._

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A/N - There it is! Hope you liked it! And _please_, review! The little button on the side... no, not the right, the left! Thanks very much! 


	4. Chapter 4

A/N - Sorry it took so long! I was away for some of the summer, and then school started and... well... is being school... Well, here's this chapter and I plan on updating again within the next two weeks or so... Sorry about the wait! _ENJOY!_

DISCLAIMER - Only the stuff you _don't_ already know is mine... After all, if I was Rowling I wouldn't be here...

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* * *

"Dammit," James said violently, grabbing Lily by the waist and roaring as he blocked another curse shot in his direction, "Padfoot, get the hell out of here! Go get someone!"

"But Prongs," Sirius started, running over to help his best friend as James pulled the senseless girl into his arms.

"Padfoot!" James roared, his eyes darting between Lily's still form and the man before him who now twirled a wand idly between his fingers. "Go get my dad! I'll be fine!"

Swallowing as he watched more Death Eaters appear and the few other panicked people around them creep closer inwards, Sirius gritted his teeth together and nodded, apparating away. "Ah, that's better," the snake-like man before James hissed, "no more stupid muggle-loving Black to intervene. Now we duel."

"No," James said hurriedly, his eyes darting around the room for Lily's wand, "we don't. You can't duel us, and you can't kill us today. Lily, Lily, _ennervate_."

A cruel chuckle escaping past his lips, his voice was cold and calculating, "_Crucio_."

James fell to his knees with a scream as Lily's eyes opened, his wand falling from his fingers limply. The colour drained from her face and she grabbed James' wand, standing and screaming the first curse that came to her head, "_Expecto patronum_!"

A tiger hurtled out of James' wand and Voldemort retaliated, letting the crutacious curse fall from James. Stumbling to his feet, he watched as the curse that had burdened him was turned onto her. Her fingers tightened on his wand and she screamed, a scream that broke something in James. Forgetting wands, forgetting magic, James went back to the instincts of primitive man and threw himself on the dark wizards, using hands, nails, feet, and teeth to claw at him. Voldemort's scream was eerily hellish and Lily's cry ripped through the air, "_James_!"

Forgetting that it was a dark wizard she faced, Lily darted towards James and screamed as he was thrown away from Voldemort. His head slammed against the hard ground and he lay limp. Turning away from the dark wizard, Lily hurtled to James' side, falling to her knees and cradling his head saying, "James, wake up. James, James. Oh God, please wake up. James."

"He won't wake," was the snake-like man's cold reply.

"He's going to be fine!" Lily shrieked, oblivious to the tears that coated her cheeks. "You're wrong! He's going to be fine!"

"He won't wake," Voldemort repeated. "And when I'm done, neither will you."

"No!" Lily's scream rent the air and she cried out between the curses she threw, one after the other, "I'll kill you if anything happens to him."

In her hazed rush of emotion, Lily felt her mind go blank as he retaliated. James' wand went flying from her hand and she felt as if the world had slowed as she heard the cold, cruel word, "_Crucio_."

The pain was enough to kill, but they wouldn't let her die. Her scream split the stale air and her vision faded into darkness. As her thoughts began to slip away from her, become radical, she realized exactly what would happen to a person if exposed to the crutacious curse long enough. Then it was gone, as suddenly as it had started, and she saw the tall frame of Andrew Potter grab his son and head towards her, his white face strained. Just as he knelt to help her to her feet she felt conscious thought slip away and her world blackened.

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A/N - Don't you just _hate_ Voldemort? icky butt-head...

* * *

James could hear sounds, but everything was dark. He could distinctly hear Sirius and Remus, and he wondered if the third voice Gideon or Fabian Prewett. And then he heard Lily, and he knew it was Lily. Panicking as he wondered why everything was dark, James froze after a moment and scolded himself. His eyes were still closed. Opening them uncertainly, he saw Sirius sitting on the edge of his bed, looking over at Lily, Remus sitting on a chair beside him, Gideon pacing beside Lily's bed, and Lily sitting up and looking over at him.

Her face broke into a huge grin and she cheered softly, "James! You're up! We were so worried about you."

Without thinking, she turned to slide out of the bed, but Gideon stopped her, his face going white as he grated harshly, "Lily, get back in bed. You know you can't get out of bed yet. In all honesty you shouldn't even be sitting up."

Huffing, Lily slammed herself back against the bed, glaring at her best friend, "Shut up Gideon. Stop mothering me around. I have a mum, and Miss Eli, to do that for me! Sorry, James, _mum_ over here won't let me get up."

Gideon snorted and resumed his pacing as James asked, "What happened? I remember fighting Voldemort and him throwing me back."

Remus copied Gideon's impatient snort and said, "You idiot. Lily told us about that, and Llewllyn was liable to have a fit. You threw yourself, empty handed, onto Voldemort. What were you thinking? Merlin, we were worried out of our minds about you, especially since nobody could figure out what curse he hit you with. Merlin, even _Lily_ came around before you did."

"When did you wake up?" James asked, eager as he turned to face Lily.

"About twenty minutes ago," Lily replied. "We've been here for three days. Tomorrow's New Year's Eve."

James' eyes went wide and he stared at her. Then realization sunk in and he gaped at Remus, "Moony, what do you mean, even _Lily_? What happened?"

Gideon turned, eyes hollowing, away from Lily as she shrank in her bed and snapped, his voice filled with worry and anxiety, "Crutacious curse. For a damn long time too, apparently. Llewllyn said she was lucky, any longer and it would have caused permanent brain damage."

Sirius cursed violently and stood up behind James, grabbing his shoulder reassuringly and saying, "Dammit, Gideon. Prongs, it's alright. You're both fine now, and the bastard's going to pay for what he did."

Looking up at his best friend, James instantly recognized the frantic attempt to pacify him. Knowing that comfort was not Sirius' strong point, nor was it his favourite thing to do, the young man inherently knew something else was wrong. Remus winced, realizing how apparent Sirius' attempt at hiding information was, and Lily's eyes hardened and she, too looked at Sirius. Gideon and Remus cursed Sirius silently, both of them feeling that neither James nor Lily were ready to hear more bad news. With the subconscious knowledge that Sirius would never be able to hide anything from him, James asked slowly, "Padfoot? What else happened? Where's Mum and Dad?"

Sirius flinched and kicked himself before answering, "They attacked your house last night. Death Eaters. Your dad sent Miss Eli home and then he went and saw it."

Lily shot straight up and begged as James' face became an unearthly white, "Miss Eli. Is she okay?"

Eyes going wide, Sirius shook his head frantically, "She's fine. Merlin, she got there after they attacked. But they trashed the whole house."

"Dear Merlin," James moaned, "the whole house. Even the bedrooms?"

Sending James a pointed look through shining eyes, Sirius gritted painfully, "Every room Prongs. Every god dammed room."

Gideon and Lily exchanged glances as James' head fell into his hands and when he spoke his voice came out raw and muffled, "Dammit, they knew. They had to have known. Dammit, Padfoot, how did he find out? How's Mum?"

"I don't know," Sirius said, his face tight. "I haven't seen her. But I saw your dad. He was going to come here too, but I came and told Dai and he stopped him. Merlin, Prongs, he looked like shit. I've never seen him look like that."

"I have," came a strong voice as Dai Llewllyn stepped in and motioned Sirius aside, "more than once. It was harder on him than he'll let on. Almost as hard as it was on Eli. Now James, look up at the ceiling and tell me if you see any spots."

Obedient, partly because it was his godfather speaking and partly because his godfather looked about as bad as his father supposedly did, James looked up and said, "No, nothing. That's a good sign, right?"

"Yes," Remus said automatically, "it means your head's recovered well enough."

Pulling up a chair, Dai sat in front of James and said, "Look, James, I'm going to let you and Lily out today. I normally wouldn't, but I think circumstances say it's okay. If Lily can stand up and not get dizzy I'm sending you two back to your house. Your parents need the distraction. And you'll be going down to the Evans' tomorrow anyway. Lily, stand up and tell me, honestly, if you get dizzy at all. It's elementary first aid, but it works."

Nodding, Lily stood. She was shaky as first, but within seconds Dai's hand grabbed her by the elbow and she regained her balance. She shook her head at him and he smiled and nodded. "Good. Alright, James, you go ahead and get up and I'll take Lily to where her robes are and let you two out. Lily, come with me."

Ignoring Gideon's violent glare, Dai pulled Lily out of the wing and spoke as he stepped through the hospital, "You have no idea about what James and Sirius were talking about. My guess is you want some answers." Dai Llewllyn did not stop for an affirmative, but dove right into an explanation. "About Eli and Andrew. James had a younger sister. Alexandra, after Andrew's mum. When she was born there were some complications with the birth and we knew that she probably wouldn't live to see two.

"It was hard on them both, but they decided to leave it and enjoy the two years with their baby girl. James adored her, being three years older than her. They got lucky. Alexandra lived past two without any serious illness, which really was a miracle in its own right. We were stumped, nobody had any idea how she had, but she had and there seemed to be no complications at all. Andrew would have never admitted it then, but he absolutely adored her. She looked just like Eli, and he showered Alexandra with everything a child could possibly want. James was never jealous, because he showered her just as much as his dad did, and he was too busy fussing over his mother. And there were enough reminders when James was growing up of how much Andrew adored his kids. I think that made it worse, when Alexandra got sick.

"It was dragon pox, perfectly natural. She was four years old then and she caught them in the most natural and mild of cases. James had already had it by the time she was born, so she didn't get it from him. But it blew up in our faces. Within two weeks Alexandra had gone from being a perfectly healthy four year old to having a fever up so high we couldn't even deal with it here."

There was disgust in his voice now, shame at not having been able to do anything. Perhaps because she knew what would happen that Lily felt that same sick feeling at the mere thought of a parents losing a child at so young an age. "She died two days after they brought her here. Of dragon pox. Merlin, Andrew was devastated. James stayed with us for about two weeks before Gwen would even consider taking him back to Eli and Andrew.

"They wanted him there, but they couldn't take it. Andrew's always been controlled, like a robot sometimes even, but he had just shattered, and Eli wasn't in any condition to help him. They recovered quickly, for James' sake, or so he thought. Merlin, it ate at them. James had just turned seven when she died, and well after he turned eight Andrew was still trying to get past it. I'll never see Andrew lose control as easily as he did that year, and even now all you have to do is mention her and he starts to break. He won't, for Eli's sake, because it took so much out of her to deal with it. But it's there.

"They kept her room, perfectly. All the toys, all the pictures, the crib that Andrew and I had made and then enlarged for her. You could find Eli in there easily, and Andrew too at times, and I think that room helped keep them sane. Knowing that she wasn't really gone, their little one. It was James' haven too, when he got upset after she died. And yesterday, the Death Eaters. They trashed the room. Merlin, it was sick. Eli broke down, and Andrew refused to leave her. Gwen was going to stay, but she's too close to Eli. She can't. So you and James are going to have to be there. I just thought you should know."

Lily stared at him in horror as he opened the door and showed her where she could change. Unable to say anything better, Dai shrugged and offered her a pathetic attempt at a smile, "I just thought you should know."

Sirius was right, was Lily's first thought as she stepped after James into his house. The furniture and the physical damage had been fixed, for the most part, but even the air suggested that some deeper ill had been done. Andrew Potter walked in easily and Lily felt the air in her lungs vanish. Again, Sirius had been right. His normally strong face was white and troubled and his hair was tousled. Dark circles were under his eyes, but relief crossed over shadow that haunted his face as he grasped his son firmly and said, "James."

For a moment James clung to his father before saying, "Dai said we could come home. He told us what happened."

Andrew's already white face paled further, but he nodded and turned to Lily. She didn't wait for an invitation, but as she looked at him she thought of her own father, who she adored, and she flung herself into his arms. James had long adjusted to the fact that he, who had his own grief in losing his sister, could never comfort his parents completely. Still, he felt a wave of relief as he watched his father's face change. Lily watched as Andrew nodded curtly and spoke, though there was some colour in his face again, "Your mum's in the kitchen. She's doing better."

James and Lily followed Andrew into the kitchen and before anyone could think, James cried out, "Mum," and flung himself into her arms.

Despite the fact he was a full head taller than her, she held him in the way only a mother could hold their child, and she said softly, "James, darling, you're okay. I was so worried about you. Thank Merlin."

"Are you okay Mum?" James asked gently, looking worriedly at her ghostly white face.

Elizabeth Potter wiped her eyes hastily and managed a weak smile at him, "I'll be fine James. Don't worry; I'll be fine."

Still not satisfied, James nodded slightly and backed up beside Lily as his father swept down and kissed his wife. Andrew's voice was soft, gentle, "Come on Eli. You look like hell."

Allowing herself to be lifted into his arms, she murmured, "You look worse Andrew, I promise."

Pressing another kiss to her hair, Andrew nodded, "I know Elizabeth. But I can't see myself. Let's go now."

James turned to Lily as his parents disappeared. She watched as he began to crumble, and she pulled him into the sitting room, sitting beside him on the couch.

Tears streaked his face and he buried his face in her neck, sobbing helplessly. When he had finally composed himself, slightly, he looked at her and said, "She was my sister, Lily. I loved her; she was brilliant. She was already doing wandless magic at three, she was so talented. She could have been anything. And she died. For no reason, she just died."

Feeling a horrible sense of sadness deep within her, Lily wrapped her arms around him, tears sliding over her cheeks for his loss, for his parents' loss. She stroked his messy hair as he lay in her lap, stretched across the couch as he clung to her for comfort. Tears streaked her own cheeks, and she watched as he fell easily, quickly, tiredly, asleep. Moving so that she lay in his arms, she rested her head against his chest, her heart pounding in her own. She felt herself calm as his arms moved around her, his head against her hair, and his voice a sleepy, sad murmur, "Lily. I love you."

Reaching up and clutching him as she felt tears fall over her cheeks, she nodded into his chest and closed her eyes, falling asleep with his scent as she replied softly, "I love you too James."

So they slept, curled in each other's arm so tenderly that the next morning Andrew Potter would walk in and walk out, overcome at the mere sight.

* * *

* * *

It had been over a week. James was again composed, after having stayed four days at Lily's house, and his parents were back to normal, however normal they ever were. They sat together now, Gideon, Marlene, Sirius, James, and Lily, and they waited for Remus. Peter was meeting them on the platform the next morning, and Remus was due to arrive soon. Lily felt her eyes widen as he stepped into their line of vision, a beautiful, radiant, young woman with him, shoving him lightly and saying, "You stupid little boy. Where would you get an idea like that?"

Laughing easily, Remus winked and said, "From Dad. He's the one who comes up with these sort of things."

"Your father is a senseless male. And he's old."

Raising an eyebrow as he glanced sideways at the woman who seemed hardly in her thirties, he said, "I'm going to tell him you said that."

"And then he'll glare at me. Nothing that hasn't happened before darling," she beamed.

He laughed again, and the five sitting at the table wondered what occasion had him so light and carefree. Casting another sideways glance at the woman, Remus demanded, "Aren't you supposed to be resting? I thought you were sick."

"Me? Sick? Never been, not a day in my life."

Turning to face her, he laughed, "Yes you have! You could hardly get out of bed three days ago. I'd know, I was the one dragging food up to you. Dad said you should stay in bed."

Sniffing playfully, she pretended to be shunned as she said, "Oh, the horrors! He denies my healthiness! I'm fine Remus. And your father's a barmy old coot. I gave up listening to him years ago."

"You never listened to him," Remus pointed out, chuckling as she sighed and leaned against him.

"I was never too bright," she teased, but then straightened and spoke more seriously. "I need to get something for your father, and then I'm going home. But you're not one to talk. I don't want to hear about you and the boys running around playing a prank two nights before the full moon again. I have no problem coming and bringing you home."

Grinning, Remus nodded, knowing that her threats were idle and only meant to advise him. "Alright. Now go home Mum. For all you know it might be a baby that's getting you all riled up."

"Mum?" Lily mouthed, wide eyed with the shock that this woman, who couldn't have been fifteen years their senior, was Remus' mother. James shushed her and listened as she reached up and hugged Remus.

Voice muffled, she said, "Don't be silly Remus. We tried that once, and the baby turned around and said we were stupid for even trying. Besides, no baby could ever live up to you. Now go and have fun. And do try to stay out of trouble."

Kissing her on the cheek, Remus grinned cheekily and laughed, "Mum, we always stay out of trouble. We make it for everyone else."

Laughing, the woman kissed him and said, "If you say so. See you soon dear. I love you."

"Love you too Mum," Remus said easily, the simplicity of the statement, the truth in it dwarfing the levels of passion and teenage-level love that the eavesdroppers understood so well. Reaching up, the woman kissed him again quickly and left, turning back and waving as Remus said, "See you soon."

Without a trace of embarrassment, as many boys would have felt after having publicly exposed being on such good terms with their mother, Remus turned and waved at them, sliding into a chair beside them easily. Sirius grinned at him and said, "She's still pale. Getting better though?"

"Not really," Remus said, shrugging. "She just refuses to admit it. She'll be fine, of course, but Dad's been beating himself because she's so maddening."

"Remus!" Marlene chastised, smacking him for being rude. "That's your mother you're talking about like that!"

"And I love her to death," the boy grinned, ignoring the chiding element of her statement, "but she's good at trying people's sanity. That's why my dad married her. Because she makes people forget themselves. He's about to strangle her because she's on such bad terms with the Ministry right now."

"Mum mentioned that," Marlene said, leaning back. She looked quickly at Gideon, who had just placed his head on her shoulder, before asking, "What did she do this time?"

Shrugging, Remus said, "Same thing as before. Doing everything in her power to keep them from passing the new bill. She's always had an affinity for not entirely human intellectuals. I think that's why I like her."

Easing himself back in his chair, Sirius laughed, "Isn't that why we all like her Moony? Merlin, she's great."

"Believe me Padfoot, I know," Remus replied with a chuckle. "It's not everyone who can help a five-year old me and manage to hook my dad in the process."

James snorted into his butterbeer and nodded, "Merlin, Moony, it takes a great woman to drag your dad away from his work. And even with your mum he still kicks and screams about it."

Grinning, Remus shrugged and began to laugh as Lily said smoothly, her voice laced with cynicism and crude humour, "And I'm guessing you get your diligence from him."

It was Gideon who snorted this time, and Marlene who smacked him for being rude. All five of the kids erupted in laughter as Elizabeth Potter walked by, slapping her husband soundly, in exactly the same manner, and snapping, "Overbearing jerk."

Glaring, Andrew Potter snapped back, "Arrogant pig."

"Inhuman idiot."

"Selfish snob."

"Bossy brat."

"Impatient imbecile."

Laughing sarcastically, Elizabeth Potter tossed her hair with every trace of her teenage arrogance. "I was always smarter than you."

Mocking her while he made a face, Andrew retorted, "Dammit, her ego's expanding again. Your head's going to knock me over it's so bloated."

"At least mine's pretty. More than you can say."

"If you weren't a woman I'd have hit you by now."

Whipping around, she raised an eyebrow and taunted, "You always say that. And you hit Gwen every time you see her. You're just scared because you know I'd beat you."

"Oh yeah?" The taunt was an immature one that had James snickering at his parents' child-like bickering. "Well who's the Auror here?"

"Aurors are stupid. They're all stupid muscle men with not enough brains to become Healers."

Arching an eyebrow, Andrew asked, "Are you saying that Dai's smarter than me?"

Elizabeth began to laugh, helplessly, and she shook her head, "Dear Merlin, no. Oh, Andrew, I was arguing with you and then you had to ruin it."

"Glad to know I'm of service to you."

She noticed that he had stiffened slightly, and she linked her arm in his and smiled up at him, "I love you Andrew."

"I know," he said mildly, and she began to laugh.

"And you called _me_ arrogant?"

"Well, you are," Andrew grinned down at her now, and then stopped in horror. "Dammit, Eli, we're going in the other direction now. I'm not having my son watching me."

Laughing, Elizabeth turned and waved at the kids before saying, "Alright then. You go talk to Dai and I'll meet you there. But first I want to check on Rhea. She's been out of sorts. I think she's pregnant again and doesn't want to get her hopes up."

"I don't blame her," Andrew said softly, steering her away from the kids, who all heard every word. "The last one nearly killed her. Not that they'd let Remus in on that. And besides, having a werewolf as a son isn't exactly easy, and she likes being able to focus all her attention on him."

Shrugging, she kissed her husband quickly, "Don't talk like that Andrew. It's not Remus that drains her, it's his father. Lupin loves her too much not to, and can't stand her too much to avoid it. Dai's ready to strangle the man. His rant's the same as always, 'Rhea's a healer, she can take care of herself,' but I don't listen to him. They did wonderfully with Remus, especially with the trials they had to deal with in the beginning."

Rolling his eyes as he ruffled Elizabeth's hair, he said, "She was fourteen when Remus was born. Any man marrying a woman sixteen years his junior when he has a five-year-old boy running around the house is going to have a hard time of it, though it won't be quite as hard as the woman he's marrying. Still, they did well. Much better than most expected. Now you go and check on her and I'll see you at Dai's later."

Lily turned to Remus, stunned into silence, and felt even more surprised when she saw him laughing with Sirius. James grinned at her and explained in a whisper, "Not everyone here has the ideal family like ours Lily. You wonder why Remus and Sirius get along so much better than they should? They're the oddballs out in the family department. But Remus is close to his parents, and nobody who knows them would even begin to doubt that his mum loves him like her own. We all love her like our own mums, even if she isn't that much older than us."

* * *

* * *

School had juststarted. And already Lily was worrying about having time to study for her N.E.W.T.S. So much that Remus had to yell at her for about five minutes before getting her out of "worry-mode" enough to conjure a patronus. "If you worry about something else while your fighting, you're _never_ going to be able to duel properly! Focus, Lily!"

"So says the one who spent over an hour pacing the common room because his _mum_'s having a baby!" Lily retorted sharply.

"LILY!" Remus roared, glaring at her. "That wasn't when I'm supposed to be fighting a _dementor_! Now _concentrate_!"

James found it amusing, watching his girlfriend yelling at his normally calm and composed friend, who was yelling back even louder. Finally they stopped, and Lily rolled her eyes and shot death glares at Remus for the rest of the hour they were working. And as they left, the three of them, as it often was this year, the two were engaged, once again, in a glaring contest. No longer amused, James threw his hands in the air and exclaimed, "Oh, for Merlin's sake you two! Moony, you ever _dare_ to comment on how bad Lily and I were before this year and I'll kill you! Stop bickering! It's driving me insane!"

Remus snorted and Lily looked appalled. Moving to the other side of James, so that he now separated them, Lily took his hand and continued in silence. James began to laugh, and said thoughtfully, "Now, if this really works that well, I'll have to do it more often. Lilyflower, you're quiet now."

Glaring up at him, Lily stuck her tongue out and leaned against him briefly. With a satisfied grin, James went to ruffle her hair before freezing. Gideon was standing in front of the portrait hole, staring at them all through haunted eyes. Breaking away from James, Lily ran over to him and grasped his hands, asking worriedly, "Gideon, what happened? Are you okay?"

Burying his face in her hair, his voice was more revealing than James or Remus had ever heard, "Dear Merlin, Lily. They hurt her. They hurt her."

Eyes going wide with fear, Lily asked slowly, "Who hurt Marlene? Gideon, oh, come inside. Don't stay out here."

James and Remus rushed after Lily and Gideon into the common room, straight towards where Sirius and Peter sat in the corner, talking and laughing. Gideon's voice was bitter now, and he straightened. His eyes glinted dangerously and his figure was imposing, "She's in the hospital wing, Lilyflower. Because of those _dammed_ Slytherin bastards."

Squeezing his hands, Lily asked worriedly, "Gideon, look at me. What happened?"

Against at a loss, he held her to him tightly and said, "I don't know. I didn't see it all. I heard her, and it was Lestrange, Rosier, and Black. Merlin, I'll kill them."

Sirius' face had gone white at the mention of his cousin, but Lily gripped both Gideon's hands and looked up at him, her voice hard, "Gideon, stop it. She's going to be fine. Don't you look away from me Gideon Prewett! She's going to be fine. Now get upstairs and sleep. We'll go down to the hospital wing first thing tomorrow morning. Now go Prewett."

Pressing a kiss to her hair, he said gruffly, "If any of them laid a hand on her, I _will_ rip their throats out and worry about the consequences later. Goodnight Lilyflower."

With a fond smile, Lily pushed him gently towards the stairs and said, "I know. 'Night Gid."

Remus looked up at her and raised an eyebrow. She sank onto the couch between him and James and buried her face in her hands. Voice muffled, she said, "I want to go back to Patronus lessons."

Thinking of how frustrated she had been with them earlier, Remus reached over and placed a hand gently on her shoulder, saying, "Are you okay?"

She nodded into her hands and spoke, her voice muffled, "I'm fine. Marlene's the one in the hospital wing."

James placed a hand on the small of her back, rubbing it reassuringly. Standing, Sirius motioned for Peter to follow him. "Hey, I'm going to go upstairs and make sure Prewett doesn't destroy anything. Come on Wormtail. You coming Moony?"

Standing, Remus nodded and followed the two up to his dormitory. Lily stood and James followed her example, drawing her into his arms and placing his cheek on her hair, "It's okay Lily. We have Patronus lessons once a week, that's enough."

"No," Lily said, shaking her head. "I want to go back James. Everything's okay there."

_Everything's okay there_. The words rang through James' head, and he pressed a tender kiss to her hair, shaking his head, "No, Lily. Everything's okay now. You don't need a patronus, I'm here. I'm here, Lily."

_Patronus lessons_, Lily thought, the words sinking in with a strange vitality that made her cling even tighter to James, _is going to be my saviour. It's going to keep James busy_.

_Patronus lessons,_ James thought, realizing what he had said with a sinking feeling that made him hold Lily even closer, _is going to be my best friend. It's going to keep Lily happy_.

* * *

A/N - Hope you liked it! And, _please _REVIEW! Yes, that little button that makes everyone happy... Thanks tons!


	5. Chapter 5

A/N - Sorry it took so long! Thanks to everyone who reviewed... I love you!

* * *

The owl dropped before Remus as it did every morning. For the past few weeks he had been in especially high spirits, considering his mother was pregnant with a baby girl. And, like he had every morning, Remus laughed and opened it, talking easily to Sirius, James, Peter, or Lily. It was Sirius, to their surprise, who sensed something was wrong even as Remus opened the letter, and it was James and Lily who followed Sirius and Remus as the boy turned white and swept out of the Great Hall. Stopping Remus, Sirius grabbed his shoulder and demanded, "Remus, what happened? Is everything okay?"

Lily noticed the glaze over his eyes as he closed them and said harshly, "She lost the baby. She's at St. Mungo's. Dad found her yesterday when he got home."

Sirius' face went white and he let go of Remus' shoulder, "Merlin, Remus. Again? She lost the baby again?"

Face tight, Remus nodded. Stepping forward, James grasped his shoulders and said soothingly, "Come on Remus. Let's go see Dumbledore. He'll let you go to St. Mungo's. Come on, let's get you up there."

He walked off with Remus, and Lily turned to Sirius, stopping dead as she saw his face contorted in fierce anguish, tears glittering in his eyes. Hesitantly she reached up to hold him and he clung to her, saying softly, "She's wanted a child for so long. She's waited for so long. And she's given up so many because of Remus."

"What?" Lily asked, eyes wide.

Shaking his head, Sirius said, "She's a superstitious Roman. In the legend of Romulus and Remus, Romulus kills Remus, and because of that she's refused to have a boy. She's lost two baby girls now, and I know there's no way she's only been pregnant twice. Rhea's the kind of woman who _would_ get rid of a child to save her first one. Merlin, Evans, she wanted a baby of her own so badly. Why the bloody hell can she not have one?"

Lily looked sorrowfully at him and shook her head. Turning, she led him after James and Remus, knowing that Dumbledore might let them go with Remus, for support.

She waited outside Dumbledore's office and looked up eagerly as James stepped out. He grasped her arms and looked at her, his eyes glittered with unshed tears and he said softly, "Dumbledore's going to send us to St. Mungo's. Me, Sirius, and Remus. Moony's going to stay until Wednesday, but Sirius and I'll be back tonight."

Reaching up, she kissed him quickly and nodded, "Go, James. And make sure Remus is okay. And Sirius. And make sure that _you_'re okay."

Wondering how he had been blessed with such a wonderful girlfriend, James pressed his lips idly to her deep red hair and whispered, "I will. Thank you Lily."

Squeezing his hand, she smiled sadly as he turned to go back into Dumbledore's office. And when he was gone, she turned and fled to the common room, where she knew Gideon and the newly released from the hospital wing Marlene would be waiting for her.

James reached out and grasped Remus' shoulder, not surprised when the boy jumped and stared at him in surprise. "She'll be okay," he said.

Remus nodded, but he still stood up hastily as a tall blond man entered the room and sighed in relief, "Remus. Come on, you're dad's in the room."

James and Sirius followed, though they had not been addressed, it was understood that they would not leave the boy alone. Remus nodded and the blond man turned to them and shook his head, "James, Sirius, you two stay here. Let him see her first, and then you two can come. I'll come get you in a few minutes."

Opening his mouth to object, Sirius stared as James elbowed him and nodded, "Alright Dai. Good luck Moony."

Managing a weak smile at his friends, Remus turned and walked into the hospital. He saw his father easily, for the tall man was easily noticeable. Standing, his silver-grey eyes flashed and he ran a hand idly through his brown hair, streaked with white, and there were bags beneath his eyes as he crossed the hall to his son. "Remus," he said, looking thoroughly relieved to see the boy.

Dai stepped in and opened the door, saying, "Mars, if you want to see her, you'd best go now. She's awake."

Nodding, Mars Lupin stepped in after Remus, looking at Dai and saying softly, "Thank you Llewllyn."

Face tight, Dai Llewllyn nodded and motioned him forward, "I don't want to see anything happen to her either, Lupin. I'm going to go talk to James and Sirius and send them up in a few minutes."

Nodding again, Mars Lupin went over the pale figure of his wife and bent to kiss her gently. Rhea Lupin's long dark brown curls were sprawled over the pillow, and her brown eyes were tired and sad. She sat up and her eyes filled with tears as she saw Remus. Instantly the boy went over to her and hugged her, kissing her quickly and saying, "Mum, are you okay?"

Eyes shining with tears, she nodded and clasped his hand, "I'm fine, Remus."

"What happened?" he asked, looking at her and at his father.

Rhea shook her head and said firmly, closing the discussion as she caught a glimpse of the haunted look on her husband's face, "We lost the baby. Aga –"

Looking fiercely worried, Mars Lupin cut her off and spoke, taking her hand and pressing it to his lips gently, "Enough, Rhea. You're safe, and that's all that matters."

Though tears still glittered in her eyes, she nodded. And still, she brought his hand, still in hers, to her lips and murmured quick words in Italian. Musing that he was not supposed to understand what those words meant, Mars Lupin bent and kissed her forehead, saying reassuringly, "It'll be okay Rhea. Everything will be okay."

She nodded tearfully and looked up when Sirius said softly, running over to her, "Rhea."

A small smile escaped her and she let the handsome boy hug her, his face creased in worry. Behind him stood James, hand on the edge of the bed as he said, "How are you Miss Rhea? Padfoot, back off."

For once, Sirius obeyed his best friend instantly and stood behind Remus, eyes dark with worry as Rhea Lupin looked down at where her hand rested in her husband's. "I'm okay, James. Your mother came by earlier today. And your cousin Sirius."

"Meda?" Sirius asked, smiling as Rhea nodded.

James and Sirius sat, silent as Rhea held Remus' hand, white as he bent over and smoothed her matted hair from her forehead. Standing, Mars Lupin pressed a kiss to her forehead and said, "I'm going to go find Llewllyn, Rhea. Drink this and I'll be back soon."

She nodded, drinking the vial he handed her, and the moment he left she sighed and said, "Oh, my baby, I'm so glad you're here. I missed you."

Nodding, his jaw tight, Remus murmured, "I missed you too Mum. I was worried about you. I told you it was a baby; I told you."

"Of course you did, Remus," she muttered, her eyes falling closed. "You look just like your father, darling. I thought I was seeing young Mars when you came in. I love you, my baby."

There were tears in Remus' eyes when Dai Llewllyn came back in, alone. "She fell asleep? Good. I sent your dad up to get some coffee. He's going to pass out soon too, at the rate he's going."

"What happened?" Remus asked, silver eyes boring into the man.

Shifting, Dai shrugged, "Lupin will kill me if he knows I told you. But you have a right to know, and you're certainly old enough to now. It was a miscarriage, that was obvious. She's had one before, so I'm sure she knew what it was, but she might not have realized it until it was too late. A lot of people think they're going into labour during a miscarriage. I don't know what happened, because she won't talk about it. But she couldn't stop it, and it wouldn't stop. I'm still not certain what exactly happened, but she started haemorrhaging.

"Your father found her, not long after it happened would be my guess, but she had lost quite a bit of blood and had passed out by the time he found her. Now, I've known your father for years, Remus, and I can honestly say I've never seen him so panicked in my life. Thank Merlin he had the sense not to try to move her. He came, got me, and then he snapped and starting babbling about blood and Rhea and the baby and you. But he found her soon enough that there shouldn't be any lasting damage. She should be fine, but she'll be weak for weeks, if not months, yet. She's strong, and she has the will to live. I have no doubt that she'll manage to pull through."

A soft, dangerously calm voice came from behind Dai, who whirled around to see a very white Mars Lupin, "I said I didn't want him to know what happened, Llewllyn."

Holding his hands up, Dai looked levelly at the man and said, "I told him less than Rhea would have if he had asked _her_ when you weren't around. He has every right to know."

"I know that," Mars Lupin snapped, his eyes darting from the blond man to his wife. "But he doesn't need to know now, for Merlin's sake, Llewllyn."

Understanding the fierce pallor of the man's face, he frowned and said, "Lupin, she'll be fine. Stop worrying, and go home and get some sleep. We're not going to let anything happen to her."

In any other situation the three Marauders present would have found it amusing how Mars Lupin growled at the man, but now it was anything but. "Shove it, Llewllyn. I'd like to see you not worry if it was Gwen here."

Knowing the words were not meant to wound, Llewllyn clapped the man on the shoulder and said, "I know, Lupin. But still. I'm going to owl her dad and have him come and drag you home long enough to get some sleep."

Turning he left, and Remus looked up and said, "Grandpa? Dad, he's not going to let you stay if he comes."

"That's exactly why Llewllyn is doing it," Mars Lupin replied. "And he won't let you stay either, Remus. Not unless he's here too."

Managing a weak smile, Remus looked over at where his mother lay, eyes shut in slumber. Looking at where James and Sirius were standing, he nodded and said, "I'm going to go walk Sirius and James out. I'll be back in a few minutes."

The other two nodded in silence, James leaning over, pressing a kiss to her cheek and smiling sorrowfully at his friend's father, he turned to follow Sirius and Remus. At the door Remus stopped, turning back towards where his mother lay, and his eyes closing in unspoken agony as he saw his father, head in his hands as his shoulders trembled ever so slightly with barely restrained tears. Sirius reached out and grasped Remus' shoulder again, saying thickly, "She's going to be okay."

Remus nodded and said hoarsely, "Yeah. See you in a few days."

Nodding, eyes sorrowful, Sirius headed towards the fireplace that would floo them back to Hogwarts. Reaching over, James embraced Remus briefly, his voice as hoarse as the werewolf's, "It'll be okay Moony. Dai won't let anything happen to her. See you soon Remus."

"See you Prongs," Remus said, eyes glossy as he waved slightly and turned to return to where his mother and father would be.

Sirius looked at James, who shook his head and said, "Come on, Padfoot, Lily said she'd wait for us."

Nodding, the two walked in silence back to the common room, where Lily stood up and ran over to them the moment they entered. She kissed James quickly and flung her arms around Sirius, who looked stunned, and said gently, "Oh, you're back. Good, I was beginning to get worried. And it's late, so you two had best go upstairs. I was waiting to make sure you got back okay."

Looking down at her, James cupped her neck and kissed her, a fiery, passionate kiss that had Sirius turning away and groaning. When he broke away, Lily stared at him with wide eyes. Brushing a hand over her cheek, he grabbed Sirius by the wrist and pulled him up the stairs to their dormitory, "Goodnight Lilyflower. See you in the morning."

He left Lily standing, stunned, in the common room, where she stood still as a statue for nearly ten minutes before dashing up the stairs and throwing herself in bed, a dazed look still on her face.

* * *

James sat, looking anxiously up at the windows of the Great Hall. Sliding into the seat beside him, Lily poked him and asked, "What are you looking for, James?"

"A letter from Remus. He said he would let me know how his mum's doing."

As he spoke an owl swooped down and James reached up and grabbed it, catching the small, and rather old, owl in his hands and unravelling the letter tied to its leg. Sirius leaned over the table and hissed, "What does it say Prongs?"

Shoving Sirius back, laughing as he grabbed onto Peter to keep from falling, James snapped playfully, "Hold on and let me read it first!"

He scanned the letter and smiled, his whole face showing the relief of good news. Sirius laughed in relief and Peter asked anxiously, "What happened? How is she?"

"She's doing better. He said that she's going home tomorrow. His granddad's there, and he said he's been keeping him and his dad too busy to really worry. And he said that his dad's gone back to work, so that's a good sign."

With a snort, Sirius shook his head, "Moony's dad is never _not_ working. Thank Merlin, she's okay. So he's coming back?"

"Day after tomorrow. He wants to make sure Miss Rhea's okay before he comes back. He said his granddad's taken out the wedding pictures again."

Laughing a loud, raucous burst of laughter, Sirius shook his head, "Merlin, Moony's having fun. I haven't seen those in years."

Grinning, James shook his head, "You have no idea, Padfoot. It was so much fun. Merlin, I still remember it perfectly. Miss Rhea looked gorgeous."

Winking roguishly, Sirius said, "Miss Rhea always looks gorgeous."

Snorting loudly, Lily threw a piece of bacon at him and said, "Sirius Black! That's your friend's _mum_ you're talking about like that!"

James began to laugh as Sirius attempted to look dejected. Laughing, the four left the Great Hall.

* * *

Lily sat, leaning against James' chest as his arms wrapped around her waist, laughing as Gideon and Marlene bickered playfully. Rolling his eyes, Sirius threw himself across Lily and James' legs, beaming up at them and pouting, "Play with me?"

Bursting out in happy laughter, she shoved Sirius, giggling as he rolled down the grass and as Peter danced after him, laughing as well. Lily jumped to her feet as a voice came from behind them, "Good Merlin, Padfoot, what _are_ you doing?"

"Remus!" she squealed, running up to him and flinging her arms around the boy. "You're back!"

Laughing as he pried her from around his neck, he sat beside James and asked, "So, why did your girlfriend just try to squeeze the life out of me Prongs?"

Chuckling, James pulled Lily back between his legs, laughing as she fidgeted restlessly. Looking curiously at her, he asked with a laugh, "What made you so fidgety today, Lilyflower?"

Winking at them, Gideon rolled onto his back and placed his head in Marlene's lap, teasing, "Oh, she's always like that. Wait till you see her late at night."

Eyes darkening, James demanded, "When did you see my girlfriend late at night, Prewett?"

"Oh, come off it Potter," Gideon snorted. "I practically _live_ at Marlene's. And Lily _has_ stayed over there tons since first year."

Marlene laughed helplessly and nodded, agreeing with the statement. Snorting, Remus raised an eyebrow curiously, "Well, now, if we're done examining the life of Lily Evans. What else has happened? Prongs, please tell me you took notes."

James blanched and smiled sheepishly while Remus groaned. Reaching out, Lily patted the boy's hand and soothed, "Don't worry, Remus, I took notes. I'll give you a copy of them after dinner, okay? And Gideon can give you his notes for potions, because you're not in N.E.W.T.S. potions. And we need to start studying for N.E.W.T.S., they're nearly here."

Sirius moaned from where he lay, sprawled on the grass with his arms and legs fanned out. Gideon nodded emphatically. "I've got to go with Black on this one, Lily. We have two bloody months until exams. Give it a rest."

Turning to James for support, Lily stressed, "But two months is _nothing_ Gid. We're going to _die_ if we don't start studying soon."

Rolling his eyes, Sirius growled gruffly, "Oh, come off it Lily. You'll pass all your exams with flying colours even if you don't study. Can't you just let it go?"

"Let it go!" Lily cried shrilly.

Sirius winced and James grabbed his girlfriend, holding her firmly and soothing, "Wrong thing to say, Padfoot. It's okay Lilyflower. We'll study, I promise. Don't worry about them. If they want to study, they can. You, Moony, and I'll study, don't worry."

Remus snorted and Marlene leaned over and whispered to Sirius, "Those three have been doing an awful lot together since the beginning of the year. Since they started those patronus lessons."

Nodding, Sirius whispered back, "Yeah, I know. But that won't last long. Watch the master, McKinnon. Watch the master at work."

Rolling onto his side, Sirius looked at Lily and said, "Fine, you win Lily. We'll study with you. Right Wormtail?"

Squeaking in surprise, Peter grinned and nodded. Lily smiled fondly at the boy, and at Sirius, and she reached out and ruffled his hair. Since the end of last term Sirius and Lily had grown close, closer than anyone had expected. Gideon looked away and Marlene leaned over and grasped his hand, saying gently, "You know she still loves you, Gideon. Sirius is just closer, what with her and James and all."

Nodding curtly, Gideon grinned, "I know Marlene."

And Marlene looked at him and wondered if, for all his talk, he really knew. And she wondered if _she_ even knew anymore.

* * *

The owl flew before Lily and she grabbed the letter, laughing as she stroked the owl's downy feathers and dodged a biscuit thrown by Sirius. Evading Gideon's poking finger and opening the letter easily, her bright green eyes flew over the paper and the light went out from her eyes. A cold, hollow look replaced the vivacious life that had filled them and her pretty face went hard and pale as she stood. James frowned as Marlene reached out for Lily, grasping her friend's arm and asking quietly, "Lily? What is it? What happened?"

Throwing the letter violently at her best friend, Lily cried, anger badly hiding the tears, "I hate her! I hate her! Let her marry the fat idiot! I don't care!"

She stalked off, her body erect and rigid as she flung herself from the Great Hall. James stood, freezing as Marlene shook her head, saying quickly, "No, James, wait. I think this is about her sister. We should wait."

Gideon's eyes were dark with anger as he shredded the letter icily, standing and shrugging, "I could kill that bony woman right now. I'll talk to her, Marlene, sit down. You know she doesn't like talking to you about it. Come up later, will you?"

Marlene nodded, her eyes following Gideon as he stood and walked out, not moving even as James exclaimed angrily, "Why the bloody hell did you let him go? I'm her _boyfriend_ for Merlin's sake! I should go talk to her!"

Reaching out and placing a soft hand on James', restraining him as she looked at him beseechingly, "James, don't. You don't understand. Lily's sister isn't like other people. She hates Lily, jealous I think, and she's taken it out on Lily for the past seven years. This year she hasn't, because she's been busy with her fiancée, so you wouldn't understand. Petunia has never let Lily get away with coming here in peace. She's not natural about it. Her hits are low and cruel. Think about it, this is the day Lily and her sister planned for _eleven years_, and Petunia has refused to let her come because she's a witch! How could you comfort her when you've only once met Petunia, and have never spoken to her? You don't know what kind of things she's capable of."

"Then why does she care!" James demanded hotly, glaring at Marlene.

Marlene looked at Sirius, who knew what familial exile was, and she said softly, "James, jealous or not, Petunia is still Lily's sister. Petunia is still the one who Lily spent the first eleven years of her life trying to live up to and the past seven trying to console. To her it's like if one of the Marauders turned on you."

"It would never happen," James said firmly, crossing his arms in protest. "It couldn't happen. Nobody would ever do that."

Eyes soft and sad, Marlene shook her head and stood, "That's exactly what Lily's sister did to her. That's what Lily has to live with."

Sirius stood up abruptly and said, "Alright, enough Marlene. Where the bloody hell would Lily and Gideon be? I want to talk to her. Come on Prongs. Moony, Wormtail, you coming or not?"

Standing, Marlene motioned for them to follow her. It was sight, the strong woman stepping forward, flanked by the four Marauders. And they found her quickly, for Marlene knew her best friends well. And the sight shook the Marauders to the core. Lily Evans, strong, vibrant Lily, curled up in the corner, head buried in her arms as Gideon rubbed her back, silent as she sniffed back sobs. Dark eyes narrowing, Sirius slapped his books into James' chest and knelt before her, grasping her hands and saying softly, "Lily. Look at me."

With a sniff, she obeyed, revealing red eyes and tear-streaked cheeks. "She doesn't deserve you. Don't let her hurt you."

"Stop it Sirius!" Lily cried. "You should know how much it hurts! Pretend it doesn't all you want, you know it hurts when your family looks at you like filth because you're different from them! And I don't even have the benefit of knowing that I'm the bigger person."

Sirius froze. She had him there. It had hurt, and he had progressed past it with exactly that in mind, that he was leaving them for something greater than family acceptance. Taking her face in his hands, Gideon wiped the tears from her cheeks and kissed her forehead, saying gently, "We love you, Lily, never forget that. Even that idiot Potter, who's probably wanting to kill me for kissing you. We're right here whenever you need us, just like you are for us. But if you want us to leave, just let us know. We won't push you."

Turning into his arms, Lily nodded, managing hoarsely, "I want to hate her, so much, but I can't. I just wish she didn't hate me. Or that it didn't hurt this much."

Kneeling down behind Gideon, James brushed a gentle hand over her hair, eyes locking on hers as he said softly, "You don't need her approval. She may be your blood, but that doesn't make her family. Your family's right here. Us. You don't need anything else, we'll take of you."

Her lips quivered and tears fell from her eyes as she nodded, burying her face in Gideon's shoulder as she began to cry again. Still kneeling, James felt his head spin. Ten minutes ago she had been laughing at Sirius. Ten minutes ago her green eyes had sparkled with laughter. And now even reassurance brought tears to those green eyes. Running a hand over his eyes, he remembered words his father had spoken what seemed like years ago._ Being able to call a happy memory can always have its uses_.He hadn't imagined his father would be so brutally correct. And slowly, gently, he took Lily from Gideon, whispering in her ear, "The patronus Lily, remember the patronus."

_The patronus_, Lily thought, the tears slowly receding as she thought of all the times she, Remus, and James had laughed in their pathetic attempts at conjuring patronuses, _I haven't even thought about that in the longest time. James, how did I get lucky enough to find you?_

_The patronus_, James thought, feeling her relax as he rubbed her back in gentle circles, remembering Lily's eternal frustration with the patronus with a smile, _how does Dad know these things are going to come in handy? Lily, I'm the luckiest man alive to have you._


End file.
